Modernity and old fashion: how compatible?

IMG_20151021_073652Do you know why I wrote this post?

I hear the aspirations of parents for their children and get shocked. What is even more shocking is the advice some parents give their kids. They advise their kids as if they did not know times had changed.

When it comes to jobs, all that a lot of parents want is job security for their children. They don’t care what the job offers. All they want is their boy or girl should have a job and be sure of making ends meet at the end of the month. Parents, at least in my country, want to move with their shoulders high that their son or daughter is working. But what type of job?  Where does it take them?DSC_0000152

This job-security thinking stuff is not for our digital children.

Many parents see things as they saw them in their time. They think in the past. I do not say all parents think in the past. I say many parents think in the past. This is true. It looks worse in villages.

Some parents would not even let their children leave them for a single day to go to the city, not to talk of going to another country to work or study even if the child wins a scholarship.

These days we talk of distance relationships. We have trans-continent, trans-racial marriages. The world has become a global village. If my son or daughter finds a beautiful Indian, American, German,Canadian, Nigerian to marry, should I or should I not accept? What do young people think? We have to take this into consideration. How do young people see the world? What type of world do they like to have? These are important questions.

Of course, we cannot let our kids just do what they like. We have to guide them; but anyone who continues to think in the past will get up to realize the sea is gone leaving some fish behind; and they are that fish.

We operate in a digital age; the age of communication. If you are a parent and do not know what is going on, tell me how you can see the opportunities that are available to your children this age.DSCN0590

You can only see the traditional opportunities that are more or less only good for the young men and women who have refused to move with their times.

I do not, for one moment, say parents should not advise their children about their careers and life in general. What I say is as a parent, listen to your children Then you can advise them; but, please, do not impose your vision on them especially if you know you are not abreast with the changes taking place in the world especially due to modern communication technology.

Let them tell you their dreams. What you should make sure should be that they have dreams. Advise them to be realistic in their dreams. Are they achievable dreams? How do they hope to realize the dreams in question? Once you see they know where they want to go, encourage them.

Above all, do not impose your vision of the past on your children. The vision of yesterday, the thinking of yesterday, the ways of yesterday will not give you what today’s world wants. Many of yesterday’s thinking and ways are old-fashioned. They will not deliver today; and we can’t turn back the clockIMG_20141223_143758


4 thoughts on “Modernity and old fashion: how compatible?

  1. I think a mistake a lot of parents make is in looking at all the things they wanted in life, and trying to live through that with their kids. Telling the kids how to live and what to do, based on their own experiences; without accepting that their child isn’t them and may not want the same things in life.

    As parents we need to let our children live their own lives. Make their own decisions, and make their own mistakes.

    It’s their lives, and we shouldn’t try to live them for them.

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