Who determines how you feel?

Who or what determines the state of your mind? Who or what determines how you feel?
As you read this, how do you feel? Who or what determines how you feel?

There might be people reading this who are happy, sad, afraid, or angry. It depends on what happens to them. If we receive good news we are happy. If we receive bad news, we are sad. If some wrong is done to us, we are angry. If we sense danger, we are afraid. For this reason we believe that these happenings are responsible for these feelings.

Is this true?

To some extent. Only to some extent. They are only partially responsible for these feelings. Thy start the feeling. But it only continues in us if we allow it to. We have the power to stop any feeling that takes up its head in us. It may start but it will not grip us. It will not live and grow in us. We have the power to nib it in the bud. We have the power to kill it.

This means that true power for a feeling in us is not in what happens to us but in us. It depends on our attitude. If we look at what happens to us negatively, we may become sad, angry or afraid. If we look at it positively, these negative feelings will not find fertile ground for growth in us. Hence, we will not be sad, angry or afraid. If we are not happy, we will be normal.

The fact that our feelings are not fully determined by what happens to us is proven by the fact that the same thing may happen to two people and one person will be saddened or angered by it while it means nothing to another; and another may be happy because of it or in spite of it. It is not what happens but how we take what happens. Hence, we have power over our feelings. We can decide how we will feel in the face of whatever happens.

True, some situations raise strong feelings which often look beyond our control. Take that a very dear one dies. You cannot stop sadness from gripping you. But you have the power to determine how strongly that sadness grips you; or how long it stays in you. For the same loss, some people mourn for years. Some mourn for months; and some for less. This shows the power we have to determine how we feel.

If you have the power to determine how you feel, is there any reason then not to be happy all the times or as much as you can? Is there any reason to be afraid, sad or angry? We have the power to nib them in the bud each time they raise their ugly heads to grip us.

8 thoughts on “Who determines how you feel?

  1. There are many influences that will attempt to be the deciding factor of how one feels. Seen and unseen force attempting to gain control of one’s free will. having a good attitude trumps all……

  2. I find this litany from Frank Herbert’s Dune series appropriate:

    “I must not fear.
    Fear is the mind-killer.
    Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
    I will face my fear.
    I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
    And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
    Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

  3. Truly inspirational. I ask myself these questions all the time and although I know the answer, it’s often not as easy not to be affected by distractions. But I’m always work in progress. There’s room for improvement. Thanks for sharing

  4. Pingback: Who determines how you feel? — Success Inspirer | faithlovegratitude

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