I changed, people noticed.

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? I am doing good as usual. I know I have been away for a long time now.  I had some personal things to take care off before resuming writing here and so the break was intentional.  

Meanwhile, I have been reading more regularly this year and learning many new things in order to improve a bit more every day.  Though I was not active here, I kept writing (in my diary and phone) about the small lessons I learned from different experiences, to share with you all here.

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A few years back, I wasn’t happy with the kind of person that I had become. I felt stuck and didn’t know how to bring about a change inside me.

I began, very slowly, by reading some good books and then implementing the easiest tips from those books. Since then I have been working on becoming a better person i.e. on improving myself. 

I know that I have changed a lot over the last few years.  I am already in love with the new person that I am in the process of becoming.

When I look back to my childhood days, I feel that I was always the person that I now strive to become but with the passing of time and life experiences, I had lost my path. I now see the struggles of the past few years as a re-route to my original path.

At times, we do not notice the impact of the small improvements that we make in our lives.  But there will be others who notice the change in us and validate it for us.

Today I want to share one such experience with you all. Do let me know if you have experienced the same.

I had been out of touch with a friend for almost six years. So when we connected again, that friend started the usual talks i.e. how life was treating her, the behavior of certain people or the struggles of life, the negatives in every situation, etc…

In response, I was very positive (not fake positive but genuine positive). I was trying to encourage her that everything was going to work out for the better. The conversation reached a point where she could no longer take it and commented that I had changed, that I had become a preacher.🙂

She felt that I was not being the “usual normal” and the conversation ended soon.

At that point, I realized that I had actually changed from being a very negative person to being optimistic. I was finally able to look at the brighter side of life even when things weren’t going right.

So how did I change myself? There were few conscious efforts made by me that helped me improve myself. I had read about them in different self-help books and learned about them from the teachings of my Guru.

  • I began by accepting the person that I was, the mistakes I had made and also accepted all my negative feelings and emotions. 
  • I began to take responsibility for everything that had happened in my life, i.e. I stopped blaming others. 
  • I began by forgiving myself and others for all the hurt. It was important to forgive myself to be able to look beyond the mistakes that I had made.
  • I began to feel grateful for everything that I had in my life.
  • I read books that increased my faith in God and positivity.
  • I learned that it was important to look for the good in every situation.
  • I began to dream about a wonderful life for me. I made myself believe that I was also destined to have good things in life.
  • I began to see the good in others. This made me a very positive person.
  • I began to stop pleasing others. This was very important because it helped me build my confidence in the choices and decisions that I was making.
  • I worked on improving myself every day.  I read, listened, learned and implemented small changes in my life. 
  • If I went back to being negative, I asked for forgiveness and tried to be positive again (I am human after all!). It is not possible to be positive all the time because of different life situations we all face.  But if we become aware of our thoughts and turn them into positive thoughts, life would definitely become better.
  • I began loving myself a bit more with each passing day. This helped me accept and love others as well.

Slowly, very slowly I started changing. Others started noticing and wanted to know the secret.

My very good friend, Gargi once told me that my conversations had changed from being totally negative to a lot positive.  She has been a big inspiration (always grateful to her) for me at that. I have seen how she thinks only good thoughts most of the time.

It is not important for others to validate our changed behavior, for us. But being a part of the society, when somebody notices the good things in us, we believe them more. We feel happy that the changes have finally happened and we have become better individuals.

On a personal level, we know that we have changed when certain situations happen and we react based on our changed behavior.

Do let me know your thoughts on the same.  As they say “Change is the only constant.” So let this change be for your better.

Take small steps. Don’t worry if it takes time because it will last a whole lifetime with you. Be happy that you decided to improve yourself. That in itself is your first victory. The world around you will notice it one day. You will notice it one day.

Love,

Rashmi

p.s. image created using Canva

p.s. This post first appeared on rashu2015

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Thank you for watching over us!

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? I am doing good as well. 

Last week India faced a terror attack in which we lost 40 of our CRPF Jawans.  It was a sad day for us (as a nation) and for the families of those Jawans.  

Thanks for watching over us!

As civilians we cannot even comprehend what the families of those Jawans go through.  Though they have a lot of courage to have a family member join the military forces, still losing them would be the most difficult thing to face.

Just as we take care of our individual families, they take care of us (the one big family – our nation) without worrying about their own individual families.

As I read about the attacks my thoughts went deeper.  I realized that we all lead a peaceful life because of our Military forces who struggled (struggled because they have to be ready for any unforeseen situations, they have to fight the tough weather conditions, they have to be away from their families, they have to be ready for any kind of attacks, etc…) at the Border to keep us safe.

I realized that as a civilian I could only do a few things for them: 

  1. Pray for the safety of our Military people. Stand by them and support them in the decisions they take for the safety of our nation.
  2. Pray for every Military person who lost his life for the nation. Pray and support the families of those, who lost their lives fighting for the country. Their contribution is equally important.
  3. Thank each one of the Military personnel for the selfless act done by them.  They are the reason that we feel safe and lead a normal life.  
  4. Pray for the spread of peace and love throughout the world.  If we all collectively pray and spread love, it will be very powerful and effective.
  5. Bring up responsible world citizens who believe in peace, humanity, love and collective progress.

I just want to express my gratitude to every Military person (the world over) for the sacrifices they make for their beloved country.  

I hope and pray for a world full of peace and love, for that is the only kind of world that can survive and thrive.

Love,

Rashmi

p.s. image created using Canva.

Being kind to animals

Dear friends,

How are you doing? I am doing good as usual, working on getting better with each passing day.

Few days back, I posted something about kindness here. It was inspired by the poem written by Alison.

Likewise, many things happen around us that inspire us to do something similar. For example, we see people getting new hair-cuts and get inspired, we see people making YouTube videos and get inspired, we see people meal-prepping and get inspired, we see people leading a healthy lifestyle and get inspired and so on.

I started my blog with the intention of sharing small acts of goodness done by people around me to inspire and motivate others to do good as well.

These were small incidents that I noticed around me. I decided to blog about them here so that I could share them with you all.

I have been writing about the small acts of goodness done by people like us for some time now. Back then, there were hardly any people reading. So, I decided to write them here again so that more people could read them and get inspired.

They may seem silly but if you keep reading them they will surely impact your outlook in the long-term. I am sure about it because I have experienced it myself. You will start noticing and doing more good.

Today, I am sharing one such story with you.

One day, while returning from the park, in the evening, I noticed a bunch of dogs on our street. It was very dark and I was a bit scared about passing by them. It felt like the dogs were having some sort of party that evening. That was when I noticed that just next to the dogs there was a guy who was feeding them with biscuits.

The next day, the same thing happened. So when I reached home, I told my father about the incident. That’s when my father told me that the guy used to feed them every single day. They were not one or two dogs but a whole bunch of ten or more dogs.

The guy seemed to be a very simple person. He used to come there on his cycle, everyday, just to feed them. From the way he was dressed, he seemed to be a small time worker. I was really impressed by his daily commitment and selfless service towards those dogs.

I have seen many people doing such selfless service towards dogs, cows and other street animals. They treat those animals with lots of kindness and love.

Most of these people take care of such animals without any expectations. This encourages me to do my share of good for those animals as well.

What do you think? Isn’t this a wonderful selfless act of goodness done by people all over the world?

Love,

Rashmi

P.s. image created using Canva

How to move from negative thoughts to positive ones?

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? Hope the reading is going great. I have been reading some really good books from the beginning of this year.

I am planning to re-read some of the other books I have read long back to see how much progress I have made in terms of my thought pattern.

A few days back, I was a bit restless thinking about the things that I had wanted to achieve and the reality of what I had achieved. I felt like a failure (every now and then I get these thoughts though I am not actually a failure). Such thoughts just kept adding up and I couldn’t control myself from the emotional struggle. I knew that it was not helping me in any way.

I know that like attracts like and I could see that it was happening. On one negative thought, other similar thoughts kept adding up.

The negative thoughts kept adding up one after another till I reached a point (the tipping point) where there were no more negative thoughts and my mind went blank (i.e. a slack moment) after which the opposite started happening.

In that one slack moment, a thought came into my mind that there was nothing that I could do in that particular moment other than to accept my present situation with all my heart. The next moment, I got some strength.

Then, I got a second thought that the negative situation won’t last long and I felt even better. Then I got the thought that things would only get better from there and I felt even better. Then I got a thought that I already had so many good things in my life for which I should be grateful and this made me feel even better.

Thus, the positive thoughts kept adding up until I reached a point where I once again began to dream and visualize about my goals as already manifested and felt really happy about them.

I know it was my intuition that was guiding me (at that slack moment) because those positive thoughts came from somewhere deep inside me. I knew I had to have faith and surrender.

And that’s when I learned the process to convert a negative thought into a positive one. The trick is

  1. If you get worried about certain issues, let those thoughts flow (i.e. don’t fight those negative thoughts because that will only aggravate the situation). It is okay to get negative thoughts, it’s just not okay to dwell in those thoughts for long.
  2. The thoughts may keep adding up to a point (I call the tipping point) where you would no longer get any negative thoughts. In fact, at that point, your mind will be exhausted with all the negativity and so it will be blank for a few seconds (I call the slack moment).
  3. In that slack moment, small positive thoughts will start popping up. They will make you realize that you cannot do anything in the present to change your negative situation and that worrying will only worsen the situation. It will ask you to be grateful for all the things you already have in your life.
  4. Use these opportunities (slack moments) to turn the tide in your favor and see the magic happening. You will notice how in a matter of a few seconds you move from being in a negative mood into a neutral mood.
  5. Once you are in a neutral mood, do things that you love to do or things that you are passionate about. This will give you a lot of positivity and take you into the frequency of receiving.
  6. When you vibrate at the frequency of receiving, you visualize your goals and dreams as already achieved, feel happy as if you have already achieved them and eventually manifest them.

It is very normal to feel worried about our goals and the way our lives are going.  The important thing is not to give up based on this worry.

Instead, we need to accept that every now and then it is normal to have worries or negative thoughts and we need to learn to let them pass. If we try to fight them, they will make the problems and negative situations look bigger, but if we let them pass, by not giving them enough attention, they will reduce in size and eventually fade away.

They will be replaced by positive thoughts and this, in turn, will help us in manifesting our dreams and goals.

There are many external things like music, dance, a hobby etc… that you can use to change your mood from negative to positive but they may not be always available. So we must learn to move from negativity to positivity on our own (i.e. using the guidance of our intuition) as well.

Let me know how do you come out of your negative emotions. I would love to know other alternate methods as well.

Love,

Rashmi

p.s. image created using Canva

Helping a stranger

Hi friends,

When I started my blog, I used to write about the small acts of goodness done by people around me. These acts inspired me to do good as well. They also motivated me to pat my back when I did something good for others as well.

Today I decided to share one such story with you all. The story may seem simple but just think about the times you have done the same good but never appreciated yourself for it.

The link to the story is as under.

Helping a stranger

Do let me know if you have done the same or experienced the same.

Love,

Rashmi

How do you stay happy always?

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? We are into the last days of January which means by now everybody has fallen into a new routine for 2019 with new goals and new dreams.

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Recently, I had a phone conversation with a friend who has a very successful (in the usual sense) career and life.  My conversation with her usually starts with casual talking, moving on to discussing her problems and me giving her some solutions after which she would ask me how do I stay happy all the time (what she means is even when I have not achieved much (in terms of career and usual things) how can I sound and look happy).

I take it as a compliment. Shouldn’t I? It is not easy to remain happy and positive when things don’t go right in our lives.

Anyways, what is the point of telling my friend, who calls me once in a while, how worried I am? Why would  a person want to talk to me if the only thing I did was complain?

I have noticed that people at times want to hear, that others are also struggling just as they are.  They get a sense of satisfaction when they know that it is normal to get stressed about life.

Who doesn’t have any problem in life? Every person has atleast one problem going on at any given point of time. I feel they are needed to make us appreciate and live our lives in a better way.

I also have many issues one of which is not having a job or a career. But I always look calm and happy in front of others. So people think that not having a job or a career hardly matters to me. They feel that I am not worried about my life and my career.

How do I know this?  Well, I get such comments from people that I don’t look worried about my life; that I am happy being at home doing nothing, when in reality, inside me, I would be actually going through so many thoughts and ideas on how to start and build a successful career.

Just because I don’t show it on my face or just because I don’t walk around brooding and complaining doesn’t mean that I am not concerned.

It does bother me. But then, what is the point of staying upset and hurting others as well?

I believe that I will get everything in life when the time is right. That doesn’t mean I won’t put in my efforts. It just means I won’t lose my hope. Why should I?

Isn’t that a much better attitude rather than be upset? I have tried staying upset and I know for sure that it doesn’t help.

We know that whatever we think multiplies.  So if we think about problems, they will only grow. I have seen from my own experience that if I discuss a problem with others, it just grows bigger. It leaves me all stressed. Instead, if I talk about other things, the problem seems to get smaller and then, eventually, it goes away (i.e. it gets solved).

It is important to stay positive to manifest our desires. All our manifestations happen when we are in a state of joy. To be in a state of joy we have to be grateful for everything that we have and we can’t be grateful if we are constantly in a state of complain.

So what if I don’t have a job? I have the time to learn new things and hone my skills and when the time is right, I will get the right job.

Friends, the point of writing this blog post is to make you feel good about yourself. Try to stay happy no matter what. Everything else will eventually fall into place. By staying positive, you are setting an example for others.

A problem is just going to help us get better. Have faith in God and let go!

Only by staying calm, you will be able to notice opportunities and ideas to turn a problem around successfully.

Try sharing happiness and joy with others (instead of problems) because whatever we share and talk about grows. Let us be a source of posivity and happiness for others as well.

Do let me know your thoughts on the same.

Love,

Rashmi

A poem on kindness

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? I am doing good.  I am enjoying the beginning of this new year with some renewed goals on reading and learning.

I enjoy reading, because, whatever I read brings a change in me.  I grow a bit more as a person.

Words, I feel have some special magic in them.  They help us communicate with others as well as with our own selves. I feel very good when I read or hear certain words like love, heart, roses, magic, faith, goodness, kindness, gratitude, joy, happiness etc… You know how I love making a list of positive words just to change my mood.

So, when I see such words, they catch my attention and make me want to share them with you all.  I want you all to experience such words and the feelings associated with them on a daily basis so that they seem to be the most natural thing to you and eventually you start believing in them.

kindness

Yesterday, while going through Instagram I came across a wonderful poem by Alison Malee (her Instagram handle: @alison.malee ) from her book “the day is ready for you”.

The poem goes like this:

ah, kindness.
what a simple way
to tell another
struggling soul
that there is love
to be found
in the world.

What do you think? Isn’t “being kind” a powerful way of confirming to all the people struggling, that there is still love and humanity left in this world. Believe me when I say that our kindness is what such people need to be able to live on. They get a hope that things will eventually get better and that the world is with them.  This hope is enough to help them bounce back into a life full of happiness and success.

The kindness of people around is sufficient to help a person rise and shine once again.

Do let me know what you think.

Love,

Rashmi

p.s. image created using Canva

P.s. this post first appeared in rashu2015.

Habits for a good society.

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? I just finished my annual holidays with family and friends and now I am getting back into my routines.

Sometime back, I was having some discussion with my husband about certain habits that come naturally to us. After that discussion, I decided to talk to you all about such habits that will serve the society in the future.

For the present and future generations

But before I do that, let me give you some examples.

  • The other day, I was sitting and talking with my parents. Then, we decided to go out and as we got up to get ready and go, I turned off the fans and lights of the room before going into the other room to change.
  • On one other occasion, my husband got into the bathroom. He was shaving and he realised that he had not taken the towel. He asked me to bring one and keep it on the hook inside. I hung it there, came out, closed the door and turned off the lights. I forgot he was inside. 
  • Once I was walking in the park and found some empty snacks packets on the path. I picked them up and put them in the bin nearby.
  • If I eat something or drink tea or water from paper cups, I won’t throw it away unless I find a bin.  Likewise, I don’t throw bits of paper like tissues or chocolate wraps on the road. Rather, I look for the bin.
  • When I brush my teeth in the morning or when I wash the dishes, I never leave the water turned on. Likewise, if I hear drops of water leaking from a tap, it irritates me till the time it gets repaired.
  • If somebody does something for me, I immediately thank the person. Likewise, if I hurt somebody or say something wrong, I immediately apologize.

Now, you may think why am I listing all these here. No, I am not trying to highlight my good qualities. I am just trying to show something different here.

Everything I do in the above examples is the result of some good habits instilled in me right from my childhood.

How many times have we heard our parents say that we should not keep the lights and fans on if not in use so as to save electricity? I remember, when we were kids, my father used to constantly ask us to turn off lights to save electricity or not to keep the water- tap on if not in use.  I used to get irritated back then, but over the years I have come to realize the importance of these habits.  It just helps me to do my bit for the future generations.

Certain habits are a must in every individual for the benefit of not just the person but for the society as a whole. These habits have to be developed since childhood so that they become their second nature.

However rich a person is, these qualities are very important in him. Just think, how your opinion about a person changes when they litter around or they are impolite to people serving them or they indulge in pure wastage. No, we are not judging them but such habits create a certain impression about the person.

We need to teach the value of water, electricity, cleanliness, politeness and similar things to children because they are the future. Only when trained from the childhood, the child (the future adult) will learn to value all the facilities (water, electricity, cleanliness etc.) and will learn to be grateful for them. Who knows what the situation will be 20 years down the line! So we need to teach them to value everything that they have…

These habits can be developed by grown-ups as well.  They just need to be more conscious of their actions and put in efforts to build these habits in them. They need to let go of their old habits and replace them with these new habits.

Let us develop good habits in ourselves and our children so that we and our future generations don’t suffer. Let us build a responsible society.

What do you think? I would love to hear your comments on the same.

Love,

Rashmi

Happy New Year!

Hi friends,

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A very happy New Year to you, my dear friends!

How are you all doing? I know you all must be looking forward to starting this New Year with hopes, dreams and plans. There will be many resolutions made for the new year.

I also thought about making some New Year resolutions like reaching my ideal weight, growing my blog, learning something new, eating healthy, meditating, exercising and so.  But some of these are the resolutions that I have been trying to achieve since last few years but  have not been successful. Why?

The one and only one reason is lack of consistency.  I have never been consistent with anything.  I tend to get bored with a routine and end up not being consistent.  I admit that this has been a reason for some failures in my life.

I have heard and read many times that Consistency is the key. It is very important to be consistent with something to make it a habit. Only by being consistent can we see results.

Now, I plan to be consistent in everything I do and grow one step at a time.

So the theme for Year 2019 is being consistent.  I plan to have only one resolution this year and that is to be consistent.

What is your one Resolution for the Year 2019?

Love,

Rashmi

Thank you, friends!

Hi Friends,

How are you all doing?

Today, I write this post just for you all. I want to thank you all for reading my posts (on a regular basis) and appreciating them.

Thank you all

I started writing for SIWO in October 2018.  I want to thank Ngobesing Romanus for this wonderful opportunity given to me. I got a sense of belonging as a result of this opportunity.

I have been enjoying the whole process of bringing my thoughts together and writing them here. It has been a learning experience for me. It has made me more committed to improving myself every day. It has also made me accountable for everything that I say.

Thank you for your likes, comments and follows. I have enjoyed every interaction with you all.

I am including the list of all the posts I wrote in 2018. 

  1. A little bit of motivation 
  2. A series of coincidences
  3. Some acts of goodness for you
  4. Words can change your present reality
  5. Happy Diwali!
  6. A learning experience
  7. Tips to drink more water
  8. Tips to reach your ideal weight

Thank you for being a part of my family!

May you have the best New Year friends!

Love,

Rashmi

p.s. The image is made using Canva