If you are a wife or husband and many occasions you realize , you are disappointed because of the other…..and think the other is the ‘difficult spouse’…. then this article is for you.I am thankful to you if you feel the article is resonating with your thoughts and is helpful.
There are two types of marriages.( Marriages are made in heaven.Is itn’t ?)
Arranged marriage ( In most of the eastern countries )
Irrespective of the type of marriage,both the man and the woman of his love have to adjust with each other in order to be compatible.
In fact, post marriage life is full of challenges and it exposes the couple to myriads of issues.
But we all know the truth.One day or other both the man & the woman have to face unpleasant situation of opposing & different opinions and views, in matters of their day-to-day ‘living together’
The reality of the so-called colorful future has to show its fangs,since it is waiting to strike first !
Once the misunderstanding happens and prolongs….There are two options available
1.You decided you are not going to adjust at all…then Apply for divorce and probably matter can come to end to the mutual satisfaction,and thus ending the very discussion I am trying to make.
2.If the above choice is not the option due to so many other pressing matters,( which is a bit lengthy topic, for some other time discussion )and you both have to live together,and you have to go along with the spouse, thus making the ‘misunderstanding part’ useless and even unnecessary.
Why to quarrel at all in the first place ?
Now it’s time to think.
1.Realize that ‘ married happily ever after ‘ is an illusion ( Maya )
2.Understand that Wife & Husband belong to the same team and they have to work together for the success of their married life
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up”.
3.We often hurt our spouse knowingly or unknowingly.Do you know the solution ? Ask for ‘forgiveness’ whole heartedly.
4.When Anger or Helplessness happens to one of you…just take a deep breath and allow the heated moment to pass.Don’t forget.. time’s the greatest healer.
5.Remember marriage is a vow,before God.
Now it’s time to put the following into action.
Don’t allow discord to remain ,not more than one minute,and your anger not more than a second.
Don’t be bossy and do not take one another for granted.
Respect individual feelings & make mutual adjustments
Make sincere effort to avoid jealousy and Ego & revenge,be the first to make the other win the argument.( small trick I tell you…remember whoever does most talking is the one at fault )
Don’t deprive each other of your needs just to take the revenge
Keep communicating,by which I mean try to find where exactly things are going wrong.
Constantly tell to yourself….
Forget & forgive,
I can go also wrong,
live & let live,
let us make best,out of the difficult situation,
I trust you.
A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers – Robert Quillen
A perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.-yourtango.com
A marriage is a like a house. When a light bulb goes out, you do not go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb. – Happy Wives Club
Marriage is meant to keep people together, not just when things are good, but particularly when they are not. That’s why we take marriage vows, not wishes. – Ngina Otiende
I asked an old man “which is more important? To love or to be loved?”
Old man replied “which is more important to a bird, the left wing or the right wing? – MarriageHumor, Instagram
Any thoughts on how not to be the Difficult Spouse ? What is your experience with your better half so far ?