back at my younger years, I never understood much about life. Why do trees blow
in the wind’s direction? Why do the leaves turn in the autumn chill? Why does the
sun raise in the east and not the west? My mother tried to explain, “it was the
way God intended, long before I was born.” I think she was right! I never
questioned what she said, although I never understood it. But, actually, the
principles of life is what she was trying to preach to me.
“His divine power
has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him
who called us by his own glory and goodness.”
2 Peter 1:3
up fast after Pop passed, and life made a sharp turn. My brother and I rarely
agreed on anything. Respect was an unheard word, and I learned early on there
was a code to follow… be it God, family, or honoring those you love, but it
came with a price. Endured hurts showered our feelings for each other.
early in life that somehow, there is a code of ethics we must follow. It is
where our Lord holds us close to Him, and we pray He guides in the right
direction. His Word teaches us to persevere through our trials and afflictions.
In return, we lovingly give our heart to Him, for He is our Savior. This sets
the motion of life on the correct path.
Honoring the past and now looking forward to the
future, we should praise our parent’s wise advice. Teach our future generations,
God is the common denominator of respect – respecting yourself and others, even
when they do not deserve it. You can find something to admire in anybody if you
look hard enough, for each of us have amazing potential. It is a code of ethics our Lord expects from His
“We ask you,
brothers, to respect those who labor among you and are over you in the Lord and
admonish you, and to esteem them very highly in love because of their work. Be
at peace among yourselves.”
1 Thessalonians 5:12-13
God’s eloquence sustains life for all his creations. I’m humbled by His magnificence and shutter at His being. Remember, if it weren’t for His ever-presence in our lives, we would remain in the absence of His grace. Let us worship His name!
With the changing of the calendar there are disagreements about if it is really a new decade.
What a silly disagreement.
Humans feel they control time. They can catagozie and contain it. However, as diverse as Humanity is, there are as many ways to contain time as there are civilazations.
I Celebrate three New Year’s. My actually new year is aligned with my pagan beliefs with the start of the year on Samhein, Halloween.
Then I recognize the Gregorian New Year, which most of the world, particularly the Western World, follow. Then, finally, I celebrate Chinese New Year. This is out of appreciation for Asian culture.
I once owned a Tibetan Buddhist Calendar. It being based on the moon as opposed to the sun. It was definitely different.
My friend in South Korea has two ages. One which is “western,” one which is based on her culture.
Not only are there calendar and time controls within different cultures, there are different views of time in various religions.
Growing up in the United Methodist Church we followed the Christian calendar (hint we are still in the Christmas Season until Epiphany). There are specific traditions and practices associated with certain times of the year in every religious practice.
And don’t even get me started on the different political calendars across the globe.
Sometimes this societal agree on the meaning of time is to our detriment. More and more people are having sleep problems and health issues because they are no longer in tune with their own physical, internal clock, their circadian rhythm.
It is worth remembering for all of the different views and beliefs on time, it is all fabricated by our brains. It is simply a way for our brains to catagozie and barely begin to understand our place in the Universe.
This Gregorian Year of 2020 I suggest we all take a step back and allow the Universe to speak to us, to reset our clocks to its time, instead of the chaos of societal time.
A silence resonates from heaven as Christ fills the voids
deep inside my soul. I see the troubled storm clouds approaching, and they make
not a sound. A busy world persists, running in circles, but I keep an eye on
the sky, for only my God do I wait.
Standing at the edge of a great canyon where extinction
begins, and life ever after looks like a desert floor, I harbor the love Christ
sends me. Within His peace, windows open with new opportunities. The canyon is
far and wide, and in times of adventure, it seems an impossible crossing. For
some, it’s a quest, but for others, it’s a stepping stone to enter eternity and
be with Him.
I bundle my love and faith and wear it as a code of honor.
It’s autumn in October… seasons change, and life emerges with new horizons. The
sun salutes the night watchman, and I bid farewell to another night. God, in
his miraculous way, restrains the spiritually encountering distance. His quiet
voice calls, and I must be patient. It’s autumn in October, and the hour grows
Seeking my own passage, I step lightly on the ledge of
fate. The rocks are jagged and sharp, and death is just a slip away. But God
watches over me with a promissory note I pledged to Him. The canyons divulge
how minute I am as I step out where courage calls.
In the autumn of life, the Lord’s love is upon me. He
gathers His herd of humanity for a voyage to explore the canyon walls of life.
The fiery nights beacon October, and it quenches our thirst and hearts. Please,
Father, turn the desert floor into meandering waters.The quests are
over – some I failed, but some I conquered by Your blessings.
It’s autumn in October, and a new child is born. Goodbyes of
another life are hard. Still, a new life is always on the horizon, for as one
door closes, another is born again.
Another adventure, another voyage as the pride of time,
sets my course upon another mission. Only God will bridge the heavens as I wait
at the ledge of the canyon walls. I built my caves… now it’s time to surrender.
The slope is deep, but it is in God’s hands to bestow the faith as He calls me
Love is filled with memories, in yet another autumn in October. The mystical canyon mourns, and the life which once prospered refrains in the setting sun. The shadows long for God’s calling… come home with Me when you’re ready.
Our blogs will resume next Sunday, November 10, when we celebrate Christmas with the “Everything Christmas Blogs.” Please be sure to join us!
Certain formulas just make sense, as in the Hi-Performance
engines of my younger days. We raced muscle cars every Friday or Saturday night
if the weather cooperated on those days. Low octane fuel was for little less-powered
engines. But, if we wanted great strength and power, high octane gave us a much
better performance. Our health and well-being run on the same performance
factors, and it’s equated to the relationship we have with God.
I’m sure some of us have observed people who sat in the back
of a church and appeared as though they slept in their clothes. Some believers come
to take up space and really don’t take part in the songs of praise. But in the
front pews of God’s church, sat the brilliant Christians, praising the Lord,
and magnified by God’s glow. Those beautifully dressed believers in the front rows,
with their hands held high to receive God’s word… need I say more? They are full
of high octane. Then, I examined those of ill-faded color, dull complexions,
blemished, and disheveled, and it was apparent their spirituality may be (or
was) filled with low octane. Their engine’s performance could be directly
related to the quality of octane they put into their bodies.
destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy, and you
are that temple.” 1 Corinthians 3:17
Though a remarkable difference in the congregation is clear,
there appears to be a more profound correlation not so noticeable. My theory is
purely hypothetical, so I did some research to discover the accuracy of my
“You shall serve
the Lord your God, and he will bless your bread and your water, and I will take
sickness away from among you.” Exodus 23:25
Jesus proved in His healing work that it is God’s will we
have good health. Many examples in scriptures reveal the miracles of Jesus healing
those with ailments. Our health is the inevitable result of knowing God and
living a life filled with His love and direction. Let’s look at a few of these
My wife’s mother was a devout, God-fearing Christian who
lived her life by God’s commandments. When she passed away at ninety-five years
old, she barely had a wrinkle on her face. She glowed in God’s spirit, and He
took her from us peacefully, without pain and struggle. I have a high school
friend who has not had a natural heartbeat since 1995. Pacemakers have been the
source of her existence, but she praises the Lord for her health and life.
Looking at her today, she is the epitome of health – glowing skin, smiling
ear-to-ear, and shiny, beautiful hair. She runs on high octane and lives every
day to the fullest. God bless her heart!
On a more notable scale, the evangelist, Billy Graham, was
ninety-nine years old when he quietly passed away. He struggled with cancer and
eventually died of pneumonia, but until the day he died, he looked healthy. He
had God’s glow of high octane. The late Bishop Eddie Long, head of one of the
largest mega-churches in the U.S., is another example of one who passed away
from cancer. He maintained his youthful appearance and high octane looks until
the day he left us.
Our health is a gift to all of God’s children. We can overcome
disease and sickness, in some sense, by living a faithful life to Christ. Now
do not misinterpret my words to mean we will never get sick or recover from
terminal conditions if we live on high octane. God doesn’t promise us life with
no pain or sickness. But one has to wonder… why are those with spiritually low
octane, appear not so healthy, yet those who run on high octane rarely show any
illnesses? Pay close attention to those around you who are suffering ailments
and tell me if my observation isn’t correct.
The principles of well-being are not only our mental health but the condition of our physical health too. It’s simple – God is the highest octane you can receive for your body. Where can you get it? We obtain it through prayer and living a godly life. The more the Lord resonates in your life, the better you will look and feel. Let the love of God be Your octane bust!
Maybe it was the lack of sleep or the weight of thousands of miles traveled, but I nearly cried when I saw Spam Fried Rice on the menu. The overwhelming sense of nostalgia came with that one uniquely Guam dish.
Even though it had been 25 years since I was last on Guam, the place felt the same. The individuals, the business names, and the political players changed. Roads have widened and beaches narrowed. Yet the essence that is undeniably Micronesia is perhaps stronger than before.
My trip to Guam in September of 2019 was a lesson in synchronicity and serendipity. For the 10 days that I was there, I only had one activity planned: the book launch on Wednesday, September 18. I went with an open heart and mind to let the journey unfold as it would and trusted a Higher Power to guide each step of the way.
The reason for the trip? Back in 1992, while attending the University of Guam, I was part of an Anthropology field school on Ulithi Atoll. Fast forward 20-some years, the professor retired and finally had time to compile a book about Ulithi. Papers myself and fellow students wrote as a result of the field school were part of the volume, Ulithi Atoll, Micronesia: Recalling the Past, Reaffirming the Future, along with more recent research from the 21st century.
Less than a month before the formal book launch, I was contacted by one of the book’s editors to inform me about the existence of this book. That was just one of a cascading volume of “coincidences” that were part of my Guam experience.
My former professor had tried to track me down me before. When time was running out, she asked the other editor to try. If this person had tried a week or two earlier, she would not have established contact.
The only reason she was able to reach me was that, merely a week prior, I had added the URL for this blog onto my Facebook page. If I hadn’t done that, I would have completely ignored the friend request and I would have absolutely no knowledge that this book existed, and hence, I would not have journeyed to Guam. As it was, she conveyed a message through the comments section on my blog, which comes straight to my inbox.
Guam is an island of connections. It seemed that everywhere I went and everything I did wove tiny threads of synchronism linking events, people, the past, and the future into a cohesive whole. I had such an overwhelming sense that I was exactly where I was supposed to be when I was supposed to be there.
The day I arrived, a two-day conference ended about decolonizing Guam. This is a topic I was actively learning about to inform the novel I’m writing. Turns out, a former classmate who I had been looking to reconnect with was very involved with the issue. When we met for dinner, it was as if no time had passed and we talked and talked, much to the annoyance of people waiting to be seated at the restaurant.
Another motivation for returning to Guam was to get more information about the Suruhana, the traditional healers on Guam. This was also to inform my writing. ‘Coincidentally,’ my friend was familiar with a number of Suruhana and an avid supporter of helping the tradition survive in the 21st century.
Oh, and so many more parallels. When I had been on Guam in the 80s and 90s, I knew my friend had grown up on-island. Little did I realize that she had gone to high school in Medford, Oregon, a rather small, rural town. At that point, I had never been to Oregon. After moving away from the island I had happened to go through Medford shortly after my husband and I married in 1995. We fell in love with the area and have lived there ever since. So, my friend and I also had Medford in common.
There were too many other coincidences and parallels to mention. I’ll just say that every conversation confirmed that I had needed to be on Guam at that moment, to have that conversation, to gain that insight.
Overall, a strong sense of “it is time” pervaded my consciousness. It was time to act. Time to show up in the world. Time to let my voice be heard. Time to move beyond fear and fulfill my purpose. Heady stuff? Yes. Yet all it really means is that I must trust myself and do what is in front of me.
I can’t help but believe that my meditation practice allowed my mind to be clear and to fully discover the joy and meaning of each moment. In Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche’s words, “As we grow accustomed to looking at the clear surface of our minds, we can see through all the gossip about who and what we think we are, and recognize the shining essence of our true nature.” (The Joy of Living, p. 132).
I believe that you can come to know your true nature through many different religions and paths. As my husband recently heard, when the student is ready, all things become the teacher. So whether you’re in a 12-step program, a devout follower of a religion or anything in between, my wish for you is that you come to know how amazing you truly are and can follow your passion to your ultimate fulfillment.
Much is written about
joy in the Bible. Jesus spoke of being joyful unto His Father, later
transcribed to, “Be joyful unto the Lord.” As we face disillusions and fears,
of either, we endure many hardships. I, too, have these familiar symptoms, but
God always remains constant in my mind. These words resonate in my mind, “Bring
Me your woes and do not worry for I will help you with your inspirational
problems arise in the worldly pressures and obligations that meet us, not greet
us, at every doorstep. Life, sometimes, can appear to be short-lived… unless
your faith asks God for a special blessing and miracle. Some have experienced
God at His best as unfortunate events end with a silver lining.
I often write of
my sordid past life, but I glance back at those times and realize God intervened
in my life. Today’s blog, however, is not about me, but the one I’m closest to,
my wife. This young, vibrant, and outgoing woman, plagued with a virtue of
grief and sadness in the past few months, almost lost her life in a car
accident twenty-five years ago. The doctors just diagnosed her with heart
failure as a repercussion of the injuries.
In disbelief, we took part in many tests and things seemed questionable, but nevertheless, okay… until the last test screening. It confirmed her life might be terminal. I can’t say how one prepares to die, except to “live life like there’s no tomorrow”… and so we did, in apprehension. With no other choice, I fought for the spiritual happiness of both of us. I walked on pins and needles, often hearing the crunch of eggshells. I was too frightened to speak much, so I stayed in constant prayer. Following my blog called Faith for Two, I knew only God would see us through this dilemma.
25 “Therefore I tell you, do not worry
about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will
wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at
the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet
your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27
Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?
The day arrived
for her medical procedure, and hopefully, it would not become an open-heart
decision. I watched the love of my life that morning, and I observed her quietly
whispering, “Goodbye, mommy loves you” to her favorite parrot of twenty-seven
years. I read her last words, “No food or drink after midnight,” as she
prepared herself for a procedure which could end her life. It would have been
easier to move a mountain than to keep her spirits positive. I maintained my
strong convictions and stayed where I knew God wanted me to be – in prayer. Only
my Lord Jesus could restore that which would destroy her many years ago.
In the lobby, in
front of the doors to the operating room, I kissed her goodbye. Keeping up our
spiritual happiness, I told her,” I’ll see you for lunch.” With tears
in her eyes, we prayed it was not our last forever kiss. I needed to go to God!
Father bless her and keep her in your arms, my dear Lord.
wait seemed like an eternity. I took a seat beside a minister, and we shared
our own hearts. The door at last opened, and a doctor in scrubs called out my
name, “BICKS.” He took me into a quiet room and invited me to sit beside him on
the couch. I had my faith until the moment he elected to move closer to me.
“She’s all clear,
Mr. Bicks,” he said. “We found no blockages, and she’s as good as new.” My
sweet love, who worried for five months of dying, was born again to the
likeness of the sweet, little girl I remembered thirty-two years ago. She
will live! Thank You, Jesus!
thought crossed my mind. Two weeks ago, the cardiologist saw the blockage in a
scan, and now it doesn’t exist!? Was this one of God’s miracles? You decide…
has been six days now, and I see a glow where worry over-shadowed her face. A
renewed life called spiritual happiness far exceeds a biblical joy. Saved by grace,
quite literally, His miracle child is born again. There is no greater gift than
the gift of life; and when death comes calling, defying Satan’s force is a
Living in a
spiritual realm of happiness, where no pressure or problems exist, can be
conquered when we reach out in faith. A great example of this in the bible was
the story of Jesus feeding 5,000 people on five loaves of bread and two fish (Matthew
14:15-21 and Luke 9:12-17). It is called the marvel of God’s healing hands,
just as He did to my wife.
We read the miraculous
stories of defying doctors’ diagnoses, but until it happens to you, we shun it
with some other explanation. The Lord’s greatest feat was saving my wife’s
life, and not once but twice; she put her heart and soul close enough for Him
to heal her with His touch.
May I suggest we armor ourselves in prayer each morning to maintain spiritual happiness? Don’t identify with suffering, loss, or sickness. Remain steadfast in our Lord’s word, and He will calm every facet of your life. Today, my wife and I wake with a smile and a good-morning kiss, for God came to bless us with another anointed day. Our spiritual happiness is more than we ever asked for, and it is all because we serve our Almighty Savior.
FROM ANNE BICKS:
I would like to sincerely thank everyone for your cards, love, and support through this difficult time. Your kindness means the world to me! God bless you all!
Praising others appears
to be a thing of the past. Everyone has an opinion, or so it seems, so I return
to biblical days. Soldiers and others mocked Jesus’ words, and some people were
bold enough to discredit Him. He was beaten with fists, blindfolded and taunted;
but, not once did He turn His back on the hateful nor retaliated with scornful
Some things are well said… but some things are better left unsaid.
Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but
leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will
repay, says the Lord.” Romans 12:19
abundant, but at times, not responding speaks louder than words. Rebuttals hurt,
and damages integrity. Many times spoken words in the heat of a moment are
later wished they were unheard by the recipient. I ask, did you pray before
you spoke those demeaning comments? Most people must not, for their spew
would not roll off the lips so easy. Is it human nature to bow down to such shallow
depths for it sure leaves little room for two to compromise?
Some things are better left unsaid.
“Whoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.” Proverbs 21:23
Christ tried to
make listeners comprehend, but when preaching fell short, a better method took
front stage. God, in accordance, knew His actions would speak louder than words.
We will learn a lot if we just listen and accept the Lord’s advice to love each
Some things are better left unsaid.
“Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” 1 John 3:18
rampant in society, and it’s not only individuals but politics and businesses
too. We are taught differently as children, yet it free flows into adulthood. The
Bible warns us of a tragic fall when we follow the crooked paths of life. Curb
the tongue as our gracious Lord taught us.
Some things are better left unsaid.
“Death and life are in the power of the
tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.” Proverbs 18:21
Those who scramble
to speak like a double-edged sword will find their life spinning in circles. They
shall never experience the Christ of this world without repentance. Smile
instead… let your derogatory words and thoughts be a secret only unto the Lord.
Be gracious unto God and let others be a witness to His love which lives inside
of you. You are the Lord’s temple.
It’s another Sunday morning of crowd seekers searching for forgiveness as they rush through the eye of the needles around the world. I, too, came to find my eternal gateway to a place called heaven’s home. I walked across the side street onto the freshly paved parking area extended for convenience. The air reeked of an odor as Satan’s evil sin blew in the breeze. Little elderly women held on to their nicely brushed hairdo as they dashed in front of cars while others ran to find their pew. I reached the entrance of the church and could smell the difference between Satan’s musty humidity and the fragrance of Christ living inside the vestibule.
I wondered when the
dress codes at church changed because men used to don three-piece suits with
cuffed trousers and tacked ties. They held the doors for those feminine dressed
ladies in their finest ensembles. After the church service, everyone mingled
with each other to share the week’s news over a cup of coffee and pastries.
Those were better times when men talked about the drought and ladies conversed
about canning tomatoes. It’s another world away now as I vaguely remember my own
The church was clearly
a refreshing place to sit in the comfort of Jesus Christ. I wondered if it was
just me or did the rest of the congregation feel the Holy Spirit? Was their only
intention of attending church to just rush in with the hope of forgiveness
handed to them? Satan’s shining sin glows everywhere, you know, but he’s so
exposed in God’s house.
Our world of sin is
never so obvious nor blatantly displayed as it is today. I will push the
envelope by saying schemes and gimmickry have run to the forefront. It’s like
running for the presidency. Subliminal ice cubes in a glass spelling
“SEX” in bold letters was an impressive way to relay the message to
the public. Most movies flaunt “R” and “X” ratings which have become the norm
in this distorted society. We catch up with friends on social media only to be
subjected to jokes and articles about the male and female anatomy. What
happened to sex and our bodies being personal and sacred?
1 Corinthians 6:12-13
12 “I have the right to do anything,”
you say—but not everything is beneficial. “I have the right to do anything”—but
I will not be mastered by anything. 13 You say, “Food for the stomach and the
stomach for food, and God will destroy them both.” The body, however, is not
meant for sexual immorality but for the Lord, and the Lord for the body.
But as far back as
the Roman Empire, sexual exploitation was Satan’s key denominator. John the
Baptist contested, in public, King Herod’s lack of discipline for he replaced
his wife with her sister, who was a younger, more vivacious aristocrat. John
was beheaded, consequently, as requested by Herod’s daughter. Sex was the
ultimate sin which began the betrayal of God’s words. Kings and Queens fell
like dominoes in the world’s wake of Satan’s shining sin. Sodom and Gomorrah
suffered God’s divine judgment because of prolific prostitution and
degree of accountability exists in sin by exploiting sex outside of God’s marriage.
Adulterated sex is a gateway to Satan’s castle. If one relishes breaking the
laws of God, I must ask, “Where will it end?” When you break one of God’s cherished
laws, the rest will seem obsolete. More men and women today need to hold to
God’s commitments because Satan, without a doubt, has made sex a sport – a game
with damning results.
Satan uses his
power of persuasion to convince us it’s all right to sin against God. Whether you
have a lack of willpower, insecurity, or mental illness, sex outside of
marriage is Satan’s invitation to give you a life of perversion, long-lasting guilt,
and recordable sin. It changes personal values and corrupts the mind where
cleanliness and innocence once prevailed.
1 Peter 5:8-9
“Be sober, be vigilant; because your
adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may
devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings
are experienced by your brotherhood in the world.”
In the beginning
of this blog, I spoke of dress codes. A lack of proper attire invites Satan into
the mind. His shining sin, sex, makes it appear acceptable though, doesn’t it? As
history repeats itself, God seized empires because of this sin, and improper sex
was the root of their evil.
Be alert and be
informed for God knows our thoughts before we act on them. Satan lurks on every
page of life. He is in the movies and programs we watch, and the commercials
impeding clothes. Sex sells! The satanic air you breathe, whether in church, at
home, or in public lures the perfumes from afar, tempting the spirits within
I pray this world, one day, will wake and beg for forgiveness from such absurd things. Straying from God is like being dropped in an ocean of sin – you will eventually drown! Your life will be forever changed when you find Christ. Pray to fill your spirit with hope and God’s true love!
We found our way
around the yachts parked in their cradles. An empty spot was right next to the
dock. We quietly got ready to embark, and the cloudless skies made us wonder
how far off heaven was from the pier. The snoozing seagulls perched on the post
tops. As we set sail, the gentle breeze bellowed the fabric, and God became our
propulsion. The shores of the water looked so endless. It was a beautiful
Saturday morning, and no place would I’d rather be than with my love and God at
the helm. He created this perfect world of pristine water, and all we had to do
was sit and watch Him work.
Sometimes it is
difficult to accept God is with us day in and day out. Just as sailing into the
open blue, we do not realize we are always at His mercy. Many times our sails
luff and we pray as though we ran aground. As hard as life is, even doctors can
do little to relieve discomfort. In the distress of my wife’s health, I’m left
standing in a vacuum for everywhere I look, I see the remnants of the doctor’s
So, I turn to God
and ask Him if He has a minute. The hardest thing to do is… listen and wait for
His messages. Our faith is only part of the process. Listening for His answers
and reacting accordingly is the trick, so we must have a seeking heart. We
should talk to Him as though he is a brother and reveal our frustrations,
fears, and doubts. God will teach us how to recognize the difference between His
voice and just our thoughts.
Find a location to
be with Christ and His great mercy. The Lord always has a place open to sit
with me, especially on this endless journey my wife and I have encountered
today. I wish I could run away and take her sailing to the place called heaven,
but it’s not time yet. God gave us responsibilities we must partake and fulfill.
Instead, I will sit with God and try to
understand what advice I need to listen to and praise His great gifts. He united
the two of us for some much-needed healing in our difficult road of life. So, I
will carry her in every way I can possible. In His strength, we will travel as far
as the Lord’s work will need us to go for He isn’t done with either of us yet.
The hardest thing to do is listen for God’s words, but if you acknowledge His involvement in your life, you will always recognize His heaven sent voice. Praise God! It’s our intimate relationship with Him that counts.
My windows were wide
open, but tears resonating from the house next door hampered the refreshing molecules. I wondered…
what kind of man makes a wife cry? The sobbing was an every night occurrence. He
arrived home again and again, in the wee hours. She told me he worked late, but
I doubted it.
He opened the door
and kissed the kids goodnight while they stood at the mirror, brushing their
teeth. Without a kiss for her, he told his wife he was going out back to work
in the shop. “It relaxes me after a hard day’s work,” he claimed. She made
dinner, so he grabbed the plate of food and headed to his hideout. The pain
sharpened as a dagger twisted, once again, by his careless appearance. The back
door slammed again and silence.
He locked himself away
safely in the shed and pulled out a knife to snap off the top of a bottle
buried in the chest. Whittling his world away, he hid his sorrows in the bottom
of a longneck bottle. His state of mind included carving the names of his exes
in the bottom of his soles so he could save himself from sin. Several hours
later, he staggered to bed and slammed the door shut again. So, the screaming
begun behind the blinds. It’s a horrible life for a wife to witness and endure,
and only God could save the innocent from the terror of his conscience.
What kind of
Christian man puts his family on a bus Sunday morning and stumbles to the shed
for his own benediction? He opened another bottle for his personal communion. As
he stared at the ground, he chuckled at the buried empties; meanwhile, a poor twenty-something
mother of three, put on a face and filed into the aisle of a sanctuary. She has
no money for the offering plate and seeks only the strength to make it home.
I ask God in
heaven for His mercy. My heart is wrenched by a man named Christian who carves
his past in the bottom of his boots. His days are numbered… he will soon
discover if God doesn’t show His wrath first, then the bottle will. His wife bears
a name she hates so much, and her three little ones will have to endure the
legacy of their father’s misfortune. Are there prayers in heaven for a man who
calls himself Christian? I wonder…
The day will come
when the blood he bled will be no more. Three little children will have to fend
for themselves while their mother struggles to support their mere existence. Her
sacrifice is to put on an apron and do her best every single day. The kids now sit
on the porch and carve their past into the treads of their own little world. I
watch and pray God will bless this mess – the man called Christian, now left beneath
his unmarked tombstone. A coward at best, he carved his memory into his
children, and his reputation branded them for life.
I have changed the
names in this story. I ask God, in the name of Jesus, to save this family. God
bless the innocent, abused wife who slaves her life away and waits for Christ’s
return. She prays for the forgiveness of the hatred boiling inside her for a
man she thought she knew named Christian.
Allow me to ask
you Christian women and men, does this resonate in your heart? Or does it
familiar? Please use these verses to enlighten your soul and know you are not
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.” Colossians 3:19
“A man shall eat well by the fruit of his mouth, but the soul of the unfaithful feeds on violence” Proverbs 13:2
“Do not envy a violent man or choose any of his ways.” Proverbs 3:31
“Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord.” Romans 12:19
“When you lie down, you will not be afraid; Yes, you will lie down and your sleep will be sweet. Do not be afraid of sudden terror, nor of trouble from the wicked when it comes; for the LORD will be your confidence, and will keep your foot from being caught” Proverbs 3:24-26
“The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon Me, because the LORD has anointed Me to preach good tidings to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound” Isaiah 61:1