Build a good team

Team is better than solo;
If you want to succeed,
I encourage you
To build a team;
You will find it better;
Train it to perform well
When you are present,
And when you are absent,
Then you can tell yourself:
“Well done!”
That is a real sign
Of success.
Let your team
Not perform well
Only when you’re present;
Let it perform well,
Even when you are absent.
Such is a good team.

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Know your spouse

Know your spouse;
Know your husband;
Know your wife;
If you don’t know your wife,
How can you love her?
If you don’t understand your wife,
How can you both get on well?
Know your spouse,
That is the doorway to love.

Know your spouse,
Know your husband;
Know your wife;
If you don’t know your husband,
How can you love him?
If you don’t understand him,
How can you both get on well?
Know your spouse,
That is the doorway to love.

Talk less listen more!

I have learned a big lesson from my observation of people’s habits and behaviours.

I have learned that big people talk less and listen more.

Small people talk more and listen less.

What is the advantage that listening has over talking?

As the big people listen, they learn. As the small people spend their time talking, they do not learn much.

We learn more by listening not by talking.

When we talk, we give away what we have. When we listen, we receive; we take in.

Listen to others and you will learn from them. Talk to others and they will learn from you.

There are people who think that talking is more important than listening. It is not.

As you would hear people say, God gave each of us two ears and one mouth so that we talk less and listen more.

Talk less, listen more. Thanks for listening to me.

Marriage ought to be thrilling

Do you remember the period of romance when, as a young person, you just met the one who, today, is your spouse?

How was it like? I mean when you just fell in love.

Can you remember how your heart used to beat with love?

Was what you loved most at the time not for both of you to be together?

I can bet that when you first met the one who is your spouse today and that small voice inside you said, “This is the one you must spend the rest of your life with,” you felt different. You must have felt happier than if you had hit a gold mine.

When you find someone your heart goes for, things become different for you. There is no natural force I know as strong as love.

The period before marriage is usually full of romance; a very thrilling time for many people.

When you just get married, it is the same. Your love is at its peak.

Sadly, this does not last for long. Soon, challenges emerge; differences begin to surface; the excitement starts to dissipate. The heat or steam that you had for each other drops and eventually becomes history. Then you begin to yearn for a come-back.

Unfortunately, it is not easy to bring it back, which makes you angry, disappointed, and frustrated; and this could give birth to the idea of divorce in your mind. This clearly shows that if something is not done, your marriage might hit a rock.

The good news is many people manage to find a way to sail through this stormy ocean.

I know for some couples, attending a Marriage Encounter Week end has been the magic wand for them.

At a Marriage Encounter Weekend, you reexperience the pre-marital thrill of your relationship.

Yet, after the week end, if you are not careful, it will vamoose again; and will be hard to return.

You don’t have to let the heat go off your marriage. Keep it hot. There are things you can do to keep that fire of love between you and your spouse burning.

If you let that fire quench, that may be the end of your marriage. Your marriage might hit bottom and never get up.

If you know the tools to keep love hot in your marriage, use them. There is no use having tools and allowing them to lie wasted. If you use them rightly, your marriage will shine like light and radiate and touch others around you.

Those who attend marriage courses, to enrich their marriages, are usually given some tools to use to attain this objective.

I know the tools given at the Marriage Encounter week end because I attended one; and was so thrilled that I felt I should go to town and start announcing to everybody that there was something called a Marriage Encounter Week End that everybody should attend.

Many couples who attend this weekend have the same experience. But does this thrill continue for ever after the week end?

It doesn’t. It goes for a while for many and the the world around them swallows them. But a few keep it and so stand out conspicuously in their communities as ideal couples.

It is important to know why some couples fall back and why some shine on.

The couples who fall back are the ones who fail to implement what they learned at the week end. During the week end many concepts are taught. The couples open up to each other (husband to wife and vice versa) as they had never done before. Each couple focuses on itself. Husband knows himself and his wife better. Wife knows herself and her husband better. This leads to more understanding and love is generated at a high rate.

If a couple lives the concepts that they take home from the week end, they will continue to have a thrilling marriage experience.

If you have never attended a marriage Encounter week end or any marriage course, of course, with good help, you can still have thrill in your marriage.

We are committed to helping couples get the most from their marriage. Marriage is meant to be enjoyed not to be endured. Remember how you felt about your spouse when you started. It may be you thought you would die if you did not get married to each other. But now, where is the love that gripped you like fever? It’s no longer there.

Why? Is it because your spouse has changed? Is it because your spouse was hiding their true colors before marriage and only brought them out when you were married?

Not so. It is that you are not using the tools that a couple needs to use to have a successful marriage. And you may not be using them because you don’t know them, or you may know them but are too lazy or not motivated enough to use them.

Even some couples who are encountered and so well equipped still are unable to generate that feeling that they had during their romance and which they relived during their Original Weekend.

We know how to help you regenerate that heat. We will equip those who are not equipped, and motivate you if you are not motivated so that you do what is necessary to do for your marriage to shine and light up the world around you.

You can be a role model in marriage. Why not? We need role models in the area of marriage to inspire other couples and especially young people as they look forward to getting into this very important institution.

Make sure you journey with us. Follow up and make sure you do not miss any of our publications. We give you this for free because we believe in marriage. We got help along the way from our Marriage Encounter Week End, and also the inspiration which many couples lack to dig deep into the weekend concepts. That is why we enjoy our marriage as we do; and wish to share our blessing. You can be like us and even better. Wear the armour of humility and close the door if pride comes knocking. You will be proud you did.

To God be the glory!

12 true colors of success

When life is booming for you, that is when you need to be very careful. Many people run into trouble, not when the going is hard, but when the going is smooth.

I have seen it happen again and again. Everything will be working perfectly for you and from nowhere trouble will land; not on it’s own but through your own fault.

It may surprise you to hear this. Many people who hear me say this are usually surprised and tend to disbelieve until an explanation is given.

There are glaring examples that can be given. This happens even to couples. You will see couples poor but living very happily as they struggle to improve their lot. But finally, when money comes, instead of them enjoying their marriage more, problems come in and the marriage ends up hitting its head on a rock.

This is how sometimes it happens. A man is poor and is sticking to his wife. He does not go out everyday to drink and get drunk as a lot of other men around him do.

His wife is happy that her husband does not go out to drink and lose control of himself and misbehave like his friends. To her, that is clear proof that he loves her. It makes her happy and he is happy. Both of them are happy.

But it does not take long when the man’s business starts to boom. Money starts to come in. He buys a car. Girls start to take a keen interest in him because he now has money and can provide for them.

That is the beginning of temptation that creeps on until it grips him well. He starts going to drink, stays there and comes back late after having a good time. Can you guess what will happen? Trouble at home. What caused it? Success.

There are people who start to live recklessly when they have money. A man will start moving from town to town to ‘rock life’ because he is rich. He wasn’t doing it before because he was not viable.

Some people have gone out and not returned.

Success sometimes brings pride which often goes before a fall.

It is common knowledge that accidents are more likely to occur on a smooth road than on a rough one.

As you are fighting to grow in your business or job , know that success is good but also a great risk.

Abangshe had one wife. Then when he was appointed Chief of service he started telling his friends he wanted a second wife. When asked what had happened to his wife, he said nothing but he felt ripe for second wife since his salary had increased.

Success has two sides. It can be good and it can be bad.

Men and women of the underworld will not come to visit you and steal from you if you have nothing. They go to where they know they will find money.

Don’t change your lifestyle and start living lavishly because you have succeeded. Money has a way of taking people to the middle of the sea and abandoning them there. If you succeed, you may be tempted to become extravagant. if you allow yourself to fall into that trap, too bad.

Let me give some advice to anyone reading this. Learn to manage success. And you who are married, be very careful with success.

Many people only know success superficially. We don’t know the true colors of success.

Colours of success

Success can be dangerous;
Success can turn bitter!
Success can hurt you;
Success can betray you;
Success can be slippery;
Success can fail you;
Success can rub you in mud;
Success can cause misery;
Success can make you poor;
Success can make you sad;
Success can embarrass you;
Success can disgrace you.

Be very careful
When success comes to you;
Be happy but watch out;
It may have a secret agenda;
Wine and dine with success,
But use a long spoon.

Do not take success for granted. Do not take success at face value. It is such a beautiful thing, and what all of us want but be fully aware of its potential to destroy you. it can let you down. It can disgrace and embarrass you.

It does not mstter who you are. Whether you are the Pope, the leader of your country, a General in the army, a member of Government, a Bishop, a Priest, a Pastor,a Brother, a Sister, whether you are married or unmarried, whether you are a Director or a Chief of Service,be careful when success becomes your bedfellow. Deal with success using a long spoon.

Your most precious gift

God created you for success. God wants you to succeed. May God’s plan for your life come true!

May your prayers for the blessings of others be prayers for you!

May you remain strong in your faith and tightly hooked to your creator!

Dear friend, I like us to talk of the precious gift that is your life. This is your most precious gift from God; a priceless gift; an irreplaceable gift.

When you have something that is precious, what do you do with it? I am sure you will value it, use it well, and keep it well, except you are irresponsible.

Usually, people take care of things that are important to them. They protect and preserve them.

A reasonable person will not waste what they consider useful.

Yet, I see a lot of people wasting their lives; not living responsibly. They just throw their life away. This is regrettable. Does it mean they are irresponsible? I am tempted to think so.

Your life is not something to just waste or throw away.

But when you live a reckless life, you are wasting your life or throwing it away. You can easily lose it.

Life is not something to toy with. It is too precious for that. We cannot afford to let it off as we release a balloon in the air. No! We have to take care of it.

We have to be aware of how we waste our lives and ensure that we watch out.

There are many ways we waste our life, perhaps without being conscious of it.

Look at a few:

  1. Spending time worrying instead of acting and getting things done. There will always be things to worry about; but that does not profit us at all.
  2. Fear can paralyse you and make you waste your life.
  3. Paying unnecessary attention to critics and wondering what people are saying about you. That is a way of wasting your life.People will always criticize you. That does not mean you are not doing great. Of course, if criticism is pertinent, we have to pay attention to it. But for what I know, most of the times, the critics are idle, negative people who take delight in pulling down those who are constructing by marketing cheap, unfounded stories. Wherever they look, all they see is the negative. Pay no attention to such people. They are best described as wet blankets. Keep moving forward an upward.
  4. Indecision. If you are not fast to take decisions you will find yourself wasting precious time wondering which way to go.
  5. Wrong decisions. Taking a wrong decision means taking a wrong road. As someone has said it does not matter how fast or far you go on a wrong road, you will never arrive.
  6. Addiction to television and video films.
  7. Browsing. Many people spend all their time on endless chatting on the web. There couldn’t be a better way to waste your life.
  8. Aimless visiting. You come across people who go visiting all day as if they were paid to be visiting.
  9. Complaining. Some people like to complain about everything. Nothing is ever correct to them. They find fault with everything.
  10. Gossiping. The time you spend talking about other people is time you can spend usefully.
  11. Hanging out with the wrong people. Birds of a feather, says the old adage, flock together.
  12. Hate! Ask my view, I would say the world has more than enough hate in circulation. Can’t we love more and hate less? We have a shortage of love, and yet, it doesn’t cost anything to manufacture this precious commodity. Every heart is a love factory and can generate tons of it a day. Keep the engine turning. When you hate, the harm comes back to you. Hence, it is a way to waste your life.

Our list could go on and on. But I think we have made our point.

To go on with our rambling, I would like us to talk about sharing our blessings.

Sharing our blessings is the way to go in life. We have a lot for free. It costs us absolutely zero to share a smile, a hug, a kind word, a word of encouragement, appreciation, gratitude, inspiration, motivation etc. Be a generous person. It’s by God’s generosity that you have them. What we receive for free, let’s pass on freely.

Your faith and confidence in God is the rock of your life. On that solid foundation must your life be built.

If you find yourself in the middle of a storm or battle, however fierce, and you feel desperate, know that you always have an invisible but unbeatable partner by you in every battle; and he is ready to fight and win for you. All that is required is that you turn to him and solicit his help. Ask him to fight for you; to throw his full weight behind you. When you do, trust that though invisible, he will do it an you will emerge victorious.

Your victory will be my joy. When you are involved in motivation and encouragement as I am, you get a lot of joy when you are instrumental in the success of others. You can understand why your success is my joy.

This post is my prayer for you; that God may hold your hand and lift you to the mountain top where your ivory tower is waiting for you.

May all the doors you knock today, wherever you are open to you! May you have countless reasons to smile, to laugh, to be happy!

God has a big plan for everyone

God has a big plan for you. But make no mistake. No one has ever made it big alone in this world. If you find anyone who has made it really big, look around, you will find someone or some people who offered them a great hand.

It is your duty to look for people who will lend you a hand and get you to where you want to go in life.

Of course, some will come without your looking for them. In such a case, you may think they have come on their own; which is not exact. God has sent them.

God is permanently working to realize his plan for your life:

  1. Opening the way for you,
  2. Giving you the wisdom, energy, courage and health you need,
  3. Sending to you people who can help you succeed.

Unfortunately, many of us are not aware of this. We do not know God is permanently working for us to have our due. As a result, we do not collaborate with him to facilitate the process.

Instead, without knowing it, what we do is we work against it.

This is tragic. We could liken this to fighting to score against our team in a football match. This means helping our side to lose instead of to win.

What interests us here, is the people that God sends into our lives to help us succeed.

These people include people you have never met, and might never meet such as writers and speakers; people you may only hear on radio, watch on TV, read in the papers or meet on the web.

There are many ways they can help you. They may:

  1. Teach you,
  2. Encourage you,
  3. Challenge you,
  4. Inspire you,
  5. Motivate you,
  6. Campaign for you,
  7. Finance you
  8. Advice you,
  9. Caution you,
  10. Guide you etc.

You have to be discerning, open and receptive to embrace the people God sends to you to help you become the person he wants you to be.

God may also send you into someone’s life to help the person become who they are meant to be. But you may not know that this is what God is doing.

We need to oray for the grace to discern and know when God sends someone into your life to help you become who he wants you to be, and when he sends you to help others or another.

Yes, we need to know when he has made us an instrument in another’s life.

Your call in life is what God wants you to do for others. My call is to encourage, inspire, motivate, educate, advise and help people realize their potential.

Ever since I discerned this purpose for my life, I have been on it. But it is not everybody who opens their door to me. Some bang it to my face. But, I am never discouraged. You must not be discouraged because you are not working for them or to please them but to accomplish God’s plan for your life.

The take home here is, do not think you can make it in life on your own.

God has a plan for your life; and has put in place a strategy to make that plan come true. You can’t work alone and succeed to make it come true.

You must look for those who will help you succeed and embrace all those God sends into your life to help you make his plan for you come true.

If you do this, all the chances are on your side to make it big exactly as God wants you to do. God bless you!

Go to Him always!

If you don’t know God,
What do you know?
If you don’t love God,
Who do you love?
If you don’t worship God,
Who do you worship?
If you don’t trust God,
Who do you trust?
If you don’t rely on God
On whom do you rely?
If you don’t praise God,
Who do you praise?
If you don’t go to God
When in need,
To whom do you go?
He is all that you need;
He has all that you need.
Go to Him always
For whatever you need.

The struggle must continue

If you want your struggle
To succeed,
Do what
You have to do;
Do what it takes,
Continue
Till you succeed;
I know
You want to succeed;
That is why
You are doing
What it takes;
No struggle succeeds
On its own;
You have
To put all your hands
On deck;
Maximize your chances,
And bring God in;
Put him right at the center.
Your struggle is a good one;
You have no reason to joke
About it;
Give it all you have;
Halfhearted effort
Has never yielded desired results;
Give your maximum
Let the struggle continue till the end.