Relationship: The ability to Relate well with others – an invaluable attribute

The way you relate with others is crucial in determining your success or failure.

If you relate well with others, that will be a plus for you. If you relate poorly, a minus.

The reason is simple, straightforward and clear. You need others to succeed. That is a truism.

You cannot succeed all on your own. You must get the help and support of others.

It is universally acknowledged that no matter how powerful you may be, you need the help and support of others to sail through the turbulent seas of daily living. To weather the storms of life.

These others are not just people of you class. You need connection with people who are above you, just as with those below and those on the same level like you.

You need people who will empathize with you. People on whose shoulders you can stand to see further than your immediate surroundings.

Let me take an outstanding example of a situation we need all classes of people to succeed – the election of the president of your country. That is the highest office in the land. Whoever is the candidate, cannot win alone, without the support of all categories and levels of people; all social classes from the truck pusher to the king in their ivory tower.

Each of them has a right to one vote. Each vote matters and they all have equal power.

If you take away the votes of the common people, the election is lost. The votes of the few rich people cannot be enough to take you to power. What will raise you to power in a free and fair election, is the majority vote.

The majority is not at the top of ladder. It is at the bottom.

Everybody is important. And it is better that we have everyone we come across on our side rather than against us.

Whether someone is your driver, your house help, your door keeper, your colleague, subordinate or superior, establish and maintain a good relationship with them.

If you don’t need them today, you will need them tomorrow.

Interconnectedness is a fundamental law of nature. We are all interdependent. We need mutual cooperation.

When someone succeeds in business, politics or their career, we praise the person which is not a bad thing but what we hardly think of is the hundreds or thousands of people behind that success.

When you see a TV anchor glamouring on the screen, you think they are alone? Not at all. Sometimes, there are hundreds of people in the background doing great work.

John C. Maxwell captures this very succinctly:

“In my organization I don’t have employees; I have team mates. Yes, I do pay people and offer them benefits. But people don’t work for me. They work with me. We are working together to fulfill the vision. Without them, I cannot succeed. Without me, they cannot succeed. We reach our goals together. We need each other” (John C. Maxwell).

Even in the family, no one makes it alone. It’s thanks to the synergy of the combined efforts of different family members.

No one is ever so good that they can do everything alone. Listen to what Hillary Clinton says:

“Being human, we are imperfect. That’s why we need each other. To catch each other when we falter. To encourage each other when we lose heart. Some may lead; others may follow; but none of us can do it alone.”

Your shoulders are not strong enough to carry all the burdens that come your way alone. There are people who can help. You only need to find them.

Mark the words of Rich Warren:

“God doesn’t intend for you to handle all the pain and stress in your life by yourself. We were wired for each other. We need each other.”

The fact that we cannot succeed alone, that we need each other to succeed imposes on us the need to get on well with others. We have to learn to maintain good relations with others.

If you mar your relationship with others, they may become an obstacle to your success along the line.

I see leaders who fall out with every one around them including their closest collaborators. What is worse, they don’t know how to mend fences. This is unfortunate for such leaders. It can easily be said they don’t qualify to lead.

What is your relationship with others around you? Are you on good terms? Do you collaborate? Are you in harmony?

Whether in your community, your work place, your association, whether you are leading people as the president of your country or community or group, the art of relating with people is very not only essential, it is invaluable.

You can reach the mountain summit. But will only be with the help and support of others.

No one succeeds alone

No one succeeds alone;

The concept of self made man is erroneous.

There is nothing like a self made person.

We only succeed because somebody has bolstered our efforts to do so.

Without the help and support of others, we cannot do much.

If you hear someone boasting that they are self made, such a person would be an ungrateful one; someone who doesn’t recognize and appreciate the enormous contribution of others to their success.

Think of all the sacrifices of your parents when you were unable to take care of yourself.

Think of all those who helped you along the way in one way or another; your wife who is always there to cook for you, take care of the home and the family when you are away at work.

Think of your husband and his sacrifices to stay back with the children while you were in school; the moral and financial support he gave you.

Can you say you have succeeded alone?

What of the househelp who is taking care of the kids while you are at work?

What of the neighbor who drops you at work every morning and picks you up after work?

Can you say your success is all your doing?

No!

No one succeeds alone. We have to be honest, fair minded and grateful enough to give recognition where it is due.

You owe your success to God, to your effort and to others who helped you along the way.

Fellow workers

I do understand you;
When you feel bad
After you have worked so hard,
Put in so much
And have high expectations
To succeed
But fail woefully!
All the same,
I urge you to be strong;
And do not be discouraged;
And do not give up;
Failure teaches many lessons;
It tells us
What does not work;
It tells us
To try a different way;
It tells us
That success comes
From God alone;
That we plant the seeds,
But it is God
Who sends the rain
That waters the ground;
And the sun
To shine on them;
To make them germinate,
And grow;
We manure, weed and care
For the crops we plant,
And the fruit trees;
But God is the one
Who makes them bear,
Be it crops or fruits;
Our duty is to play our part;
And in thanksgiving prayer,
We hand over the rest to God,
To play his own role.
Aren’t we fellow-workers
With God
In shaping life on earth?
Truly co-workers with he
That is mighty;
He that can do and undo.
He that is the king of kings;
He,the unquestionable king
Of the universe.

The world we want

When shall we have
A peaceful world?
All the world now seems
To be torn apart;
Brother in battle againt brother;
Sister fighting against sister;
Friends of yesterday
Enemies of today;
When shall we have a world where love flows?
What we have now is a world
Where enmity flows;
When shall we have a world
Where people work together
As collaborators not rivals;
In collaboration
Instead of in competition?
That is the world we pray for;
Work and fight for;
That is the world we want.

Spouses work together

If you are married,
Or when you marry,
Don’t spend time fighting
With your spouse.
It is not only a waste of time,
It is also a misuse of time;
A mismanagement of time;
Abuse of time;
And working against yourself
Not for yourself;
Working for failure
Instead of working for success;
Spouses should work together;
And support each other;
So as to enhance their chances
Of succeeding.
Start today to work
With your spouse
If you are married;
And if you are not married,
Decide now
That you will work
When you become married tomorrow.

No unhealthy competition

man running at marathon event

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Stop that competition!
Too much competition
We have among us;
Too much competition
In the world;
Unhealthy competition;
Why are we always competing?
When soon we become rivals;
Rivalry leads to animosity;
And then to outright hate;
Can you see what comes next?
Conflict.
people running during daytime

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Where there is hatred,
There is conflict;
And hostility;
The next thing,
The wars and killings
That are rocking the world;
Something needs to be done;
What do you think?
Instead of competition,
Let us try collaboration;
Instead of rivalry,
Let us have co-operation
Instead of animosity or hate,
Let us promote love;
Instead of conflict and wars,
Let us sue for peace.
beach calm clouds coconut trees

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You hold my hand …

There’s something I don’t know;
That I should know
For my good;
Many people around me know it;
But nobody is telling me;
Even you know it,
But you are not telling me;
You know how useful it will be
To me;
So why are you not telling me?
Don’t you like me to grow?
If I grow will that stop you
From also growing?
Isn’t it better if we both grow?
Help me grow and I help you grow;
It’s better;
See the way I am struggling,
And you know what I can do
To quickly arrive;
But you say nothing;
If I also know what can help you
And I say nothing,
We both lose;
If you tell me what you know,
And I tell you what I know,
Both of us will grow;
Isn’t that true?
You hold my hand,
I hold your hand;
We are stronger and go further.

No two ways

If we are not friends,
Let us become friends;
It will be good for you,
And good for me;
What’s all the quarrelling
And enmity for?
It doesn’t help anybody;
Relationship;
Good relationship is key;
Let’s work together;
Let’s cooperate;
And we’ll both gain;
And all behind us will be
Happy for that.
And let me tell you;
As long as there
Is no justice,
There can be no lasting
Peace;
If we want peace,
Let us go for justice.
There is no other way.
There are no two ways.
Collaboration;
Justice;
Peace;
And nothing surpasses this.