I want us to have a deep conversation;
Which I hope will lead to conversion;
If we open our hearts to each other
It will lift our relationship higher.
I don’t believe in deadlock;
I believe in dialogue;
To succeed with people even in marriage,
Dialogue, I strongly encourage.
To have peace in your house,
Always have conversations with your spouse.
People like to talk about themselves. Most or all of us know this to be true.
I used to find myself talking so much and not listening. A few months ago I decided
to start listening to people-friends, strangers, and family.
I have discovered that people talk so much about themselves or their lives that one does not have the opportunity to get a word in…perhaps a nod or a “Yes, that’s right”….
Do people know how to have conversations anymore? I wonder about that…..
I thought it would aggravate me but it has not. I just allow their thoughts and conversations rattle around in my brain and then I pray for them.
After all, I have my blog to put my thoughts down in cyberspace…..maybe the people I talk to have no one to listen….or maybe they have not discovered the wonderful world of blogging!!
My delivery: Being a business woman in a predominately man’s domain in the work arena has always put me at a disadvantage. Therefore, I have found that my delivery of conversation can be a bit brusque. I have been called, ‘Terrier’, ‘Go Getter’, Ice Queen,Barracuda, Shark, and many other names that are not so polite to describe a tough businesswoman. You get the picture…..
I have noticed in my months of recent illness that the tough delivery that worked so well when I was young and in business, as well as the tough discipline given to my children when they were young does not always work well with family members. My tough deliveries have turned into commands. Commanding has become a habit of mine. I have recently been more mindful Not to Command. I have to work at it each day. I try instead to ask questions that will not irritate family members, to draw them into conversation and let them do most of the talking. I have also started to ask nicely when a chore needs to be done instead of Commanding the chore to be done. It is working…slowly…..I am remembering to say thank-you…I am remembering to ‘tack on’ an endearment once I have asked nicely for something to be done, such as, ‘Please take out the trash my love’..or something of the sort.
I can’t say it has been a Dramatic change, but hopefully it is a better change, even though it’s slow…I am trying these new things out so that my older children will not think of me as a Tyrant, and also to see how they react when spoken to nicely, and I am hoping that it will encourage them to do the same….
Let’s see how this experiment works out!!
Ngwasi: What is this that is raging fiercely in my heart like a wild fire on a dry hill on a sunny, windy day?
Chebi: It’s called love.
Ngwasi: It burns. Shall it always burn so fiercely?
Chebi: Don’t be deceived. It can swing from one extreme to the other. It can become as cold as ice. It can also melt like snow on a sunny day; and you will see no trace except deep scars in your heart.
Ngwasi: How strange! How unfortunate also!
Chebi: Yes it is! Such sweet sorrow it can bring. It can bring joy; and it can bring sorrow. It’s hard to know; hard to understand; hard to master.
Ngwasi: Oh love! How strange you can be!