A marriage ceremony is such A sweet occasion; When husband and wife See nothing but happiness Ahead; When they feel like one And hope to be one forever. Marriage is a union ordained by God; And made for enjoyment Of husband and wife; Our prayers for All the couples of the world; Grant O Lord, That married couples May find joy in each other!
If you are a wife or husband and many occasions you realize , you are disappointed because of the other…..and think the other is the ‘difficult spouse’…. then this article is for you.I am thankful to you if you feel the article is resonating with your thoughts and is helpful.
There are two types of marriages.( Marriages are made in heaven.Is itn’t ?)
Arranged marriage ( In most of the eastern countries )
Irrespective of the type of marriage,both the man and the woman of his love have to adjust with each other in order to be compatible.
In fact, post marriage life is full of challenges and it exposes the couple to myriads of issues.
But we all know the truth.One day or other both the man & the woman have to face unpleasant situation of opposing & different opinions and views, in matters of their day-to-day ‘living together’
The reality of the so-called colorful future has to show its fangs,since it is waiting to strike first !
Once the misunderstanding happens and prolongs….There are two options available
1.You decided you are not going to adjust at all…then Apply for divorce and probably matter can come to end to the mutual satisfaction,and thus ending the very discussion I am trying to make.
2.If the above choice is not the option due to so many other pressing matters,( which is a bit lengthy topic, for some other time discussion )and you both have to live together,and you have to go along with the spouse, thus making the ‘misunderstanding part’ useless and even unnecessary.
Why to quarrel at all in the first place ?
Now it’s time to think.
1.Realize that ‘ married happily ever after ‘ is an illusion ( Maya )
2.Understand that Wife & Husband belong to the same team and they have to work together for the success of their married life
“Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up”.Ecclesiastes4.9-10
3.We often hurt our spouse knowingly or unknowingly.Do you know the solution ? Ask for ‘forgiveness’ whole heartedly.
4.When Anger or Helplessness happens to one of you…just take a deep breath and allow the heated moment to pass.Don’t forget.. time’s the greatest healer.
5.Remember marriage is a vow,before God.
Now it’s time to put the following into action.
Don’t allow discord to remain ,not more than one minute,and your anger not more than a second.
Don’t be bossy and do not take one another for granted.
Respect individual feelings & make mutual adjustments
Make sincere effort to avoid jealousy and Ego & revenge,be the first to make the other win the argument.( small trick I tell you…remember whoever does most talking is the one at fault )
Don’t deprive each other of your needs just to take the revenge
Keep communicating,by which I mean try to find where exactly things are going wrong.
Constantly tell to yourself….
Forget & forgive,
I can go also wrong,
live & let live,
let us make best,out of the difficult situation,
I trust you.
A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers – Robert QuillenA perfect marriage is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.-yourtango.comA marriage is a like a house. When a light bulb goes out, you do not go and buy a new house, you fix the light bulb. – Happy Wives ClubMarriage is meant to keep people together, not just when things are good, but particularly when they are not. That’s why we take marriage vows, not wishes. – Ngina OtiendeI asked an old man “which is more important? To love or to be loved?”Old man replied “which is more important to a bird, the left wing or the right wing?– MarriageHumor, InstagramWhich quote you liked most ?
Any thoughts on how not to be the Difficult Spouse ? What is your experience with your better half so far ?
The golden rule is as valid today as it has always been. Let’s look at it in the realm of marriage.
If you want a great wife
for your son, bring up your daughter to be a great wife for someone else’s son.
Couples need to take note of this.
Let someone else’s son not have the type of wife
you do not like for your son.
If you want a great husband for your daughter, bring up your son to be a great husband
for someone else’s daughter.
Let someone else’s daughter not have
the type of husband
You do not like
For your daughter.
We have to learn to give to others as the golden rule stipulates. What you like from others be sure you are not giving the opposite to others.
Since we love our spouses to be good spouses, we must train our children to be good spouses.
If we all did this, the world would be an excellent place.
Marriage was instituted by God. It was not man who instituted marriage. Marriage is God’s plan for us humans. God instituted marriage when he created Adam and decided that a partner would be good for him and created Eve. He created one male one female; and gave them to each other. From then, matrimony was instituted. God put them together. They did not come together on their own. It was God who put them together; and they became one.
God is the binding force in true marriage. He is right at its center.
When a man and a woman marry in Church, it means God has put them together. They “cleave” together and become one. They are not to let go of each other. It’s a life long commitment. They “become one flesh” with God being the cementing force.
This is the plan which God, who instituted marriage put in place for marriage. For our marriage to enjoy His full blessings, we have to follow this plan.
Many marriages hit hard rocks because the couples do not follow the plan that the one who instituted marriage put for it.
Let’s look at this plan point by point:
One man, one wife.
They are put together by God (wed in Church,)
Cleave together and become one flesh. No longer two but one.
Lifelong commitment. We never heard that Adam threw out Eve or that Eve left Adam.
Stay focused on God.
Obey God’s command ( Gods plan for marriage).
The moment husband and wife remove their hearts and minds from God, the devil takes control of them. The next thing is disobedience of God’s plan for their marriage which means sin. This is followed by loss of God’s grace.
Dear loving couples, let us follow God’s plan for marriage and be successful and happy couples.
“Respect God’s plan for marriage and you will be successful and happy in your marriage” (Romilia Quotes)
As husband and wife,
You should help each other succeed;
Be each other’s support;
Don’t work against each other,
That is what some couples unfortunately do;
Don’t do it;
Do not take the opposition bench
In your home,
You should be
Your spouse’s leading ally,
Your spouse’s number one business partner;
You are journeying together
To the common destination of
Success as a couple;
Don’t be rivals;
Don’t try to prove you are better;
Both of you are good;
With different gifts;
Meant to complement
Not to compete.
Weak spouses try to prove strong;
Strong spouses try to complement each other.
In a nutshell, help your partner succeed;
Don’t be a hindrance to your spouse;
Don’t be an obstacle to your spouse;
Be each other’s asset.
Each other’s blessing.
Help your spouse succeed.
As husband and wife,
Do things together
As a loving couple;
This way you tap
Your couple power.
Watch television together;
Go to buy together;
Go to Church together;
Sit in the same place.
Go home together;
Go visit friends together;
Go social together;
Be always seen together;
Do it all together;
You got married to
Journey together like
You are not singles
But a couple.
Doing it together gives
You more power
Than you can imagine.
This is couple power
What do you expect
Of your spouse?
Don’t you expect
Perhaps, you think
Your spouse is
A super being;
We are all ordinary
Made in the image
Don’t expect your
To do things that
It is not possible.
Do not demand
Too much of others.
At the start of most marriages, husband and wife are so proud of each other. Their relationship is perfect as if made in heaven. But in some cases, this does not take long. They stop being proud of each other. In fact, one person may be ashamed of the other. Hence, the following poem: Your spouse, ashamed of you?
Is your spouse proud of you?Don’t make your spouse
Ashamed of you;
Make their spouses
Ashamed of them,
Which is not a good thing
For their marriage;
Do not do like them;
You should do is
Make your spouse proud
If your spouse is proud
Your marriage will be bound
If your spouse is ashamed
Your marriage will be bound
Make your spouse
Not ashamed, but proud
Dear friends, do you know some things that can make your spouse ashamed of you? What about things that can make your spouse proud of you? Let’s share. By sharing we grow in marriage.