5 Lessons I Learned from Overcoming the Hardest Days of My Life

There are useful lessons that we learn from experience. Sometimes when the going is hard, that gives us an opportunity to grow. Read this post:

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The futile discovery

Credit:- Google

The threads untwined their knots 
The cage loosened its bars 
The wings unfurled for a flight 
But what if I chose the submarine?

The clouds resorted to their station 
The sky signalled my movement 
The path cleared its hurdles 
But what if I chose the submarine?

Missing the flight,
I chose to dive ; 
To discover the pearls 
Under the Mollusk’s shell!

Before I could strive hard, 
The gems found me 
Bedazzling my energies, 
In the vortex of abysmal!

Oh! There I sank underwater 
Once Again! 
Amid the confinements, 
Yearning for freedom 
Waiting for the signal 
Up above in the sky 
To get ready for the flight!

Posted onJanuary 24, 2019Categoriesdiscoverintrospectionlessonslifepoetryretrospection

Tagschoicesjourney6 Commentson The Futile DiscoveryEdit”The Futile Discovery”

NO SHAM FOAM

10 lessons I learned or relearned in 2018

2018 has come and gone;
Many lessons it has left behind. Here are 10 of those that I remember:

  1. That nothing lasts forever.
  2. That everything passes away.
  3. That hard work pays.
  4. That you need to be courageous.
  5. That nothing worthwhile comes easily in life.
  6. That if you are on the right path and keep on going, you will arrive.
  7. That many people who are at the bottom today will be at the top by year end.
  8. That God is good.
  9. That prayer can move mountains.
  10. That when one door closes another one opens somewhere.

What lesson or lessons worth sharing did you learn or relearn in 2018?

What I have learned today

Today,
I have learned
It is good
To be patient;
Today,
I have learned
It is good
To work hard;
Today,
I have learned
It is good
To persevere;
Today,
I have learned
It is good
To be humble;
Today,
I have learned
It is good
To struggle;
Today,
I have learned
It is good
To be kind;
Today,
I have learned,
It is good
To respect others;
Today,
I have learned
To speak with care;
Today,
I have learned
To be prudent.
Have you learned
Anything today?
What have you
Learned today?
Share!

I am still far away…..

Rambling through the untraveled vastness
Sighing for the unique greatness,
I reach my destination
Fulfilling the manifestation
And Oh I realize!
I am still far away

Ambition that lead the sight
With enormous power in the flight,
I headed towards a goal
Until I stumbled upon a pothole
And Oh I realize!
I am still far away

Celebrating the victories
Ignoring the miseries,
I try finding grace
In the worldly menace
And Oh I realize!
I am still far away

Speculating upon my existence
Hiding weight with drapes of pretense,
I act in the most immaculate manner
Demanding work out of my caliber
And Oh I realize!
I am still far away

Breathing hard with people around

Crying incessantly when none surround,
Meditating for tranqillity
With mind pushing away stability
And Oh I realize!
I am still far away

Leaving my destination
That I carved through passion ,
I am gonna sail across the ocean;
Never to reach those edges,
That have mortal ends
But where peace resides,
With no veiled devil spouse
Where love is free,
With no attached strings
Where happiness resonates abundantly,
With no defined limitations
Where righteousness exists,
With no need for justice
Where fears have no say,
With no deficiencies to reveal
Where numbers exist for play,
With no values to assign
Where acceptance of verity is easy,
With no grief hovering
Where giving becomes unconditional,
With no ulterior motives
Where contentment lives,
With no body to own.

I know
And yes! I know
I am still far away 
To realize that all has been in me!
I am still far away
To dive into the sea of divinity
That perennially flows in my blood,
I am still far away
To extract the glowing pearls
That can prove my worth,
I am still far away
To be near to solitude
That can give me solace,
I am still far away
To perceive the colours
Between black and white,
I am still far away 
To know that stars are uncountable,
I am still far away
To know the purpose
That makes the earth attractive for my stay,
I am far far away
To know who I am!

Comparison Kills Contentment

“No one makes you feel inferior without your consent.” Eleanor Roosevelt

When I knew I wanted to write on this subject, I was a little intimidated. For good reason, I believe.

To uncover and call out all the destructive forms of “comparison” in all its layers and intricacies? That’s a big task to take on, for anyone. But out of all the things we need to address to ourselves, comparison is the elephant in the room. So, here we are.

Let’s start with a little bit of reflection. How exactly do you think comparison has affected your life lately?

You are certainly not alone if the only thing comparison contributes to your life is mostly negative. Feelings of discontent, jealousy, unworthiness, and sadness often stem from when we ourselves compare our behind the scenes moments to the social media highlight reels of another.

So, why exactly do we continue to compare if it has such awful consequences?

Well, first off, because it’s easy. It’s the most second nature thing that we can do. We are always wondering how we rank with people. But, again…it would be so much easier if we didn’t concern ourselves with the constant need to be best. Why do we do it?

Is it because we feel our worth somehow increases if we have the perfect hair, the perfect teeth, the perfect job, the perfect home? Is that why we idealize those we feel do have all those things and more? Do we really think that’s the end all of living? Or is life really about who you are, first and fore most?

It’s easy to say to yourself, “yes! Life is about who you are on the inside, not the outside.” But, when it comes down to the way we live? We contradict ourselves completely, by glorifying any well dressed, rich, and beautiful person like they aren’t entirely as human as we are.

The thing is, if we base our worth on feelings of worth, we will always be on a see-saw of emotions. We will never have a firm foundation of identity and we will never grasp our real worth.

So how are we going to address this comparison monster?

By getting to the heart of comparison, and debunking every little lie it whispers in your ear.

The perfection illusion

The people we compare ourselves to seem to have it all. At least, all that we think we are lacking. Whether that be the looks we think we don’t live up to, or the travel photography we wish we could have taken in person, whether it be the friend that seems like they have it ALL together…

We all are attracted to the ultimate “if only’s” in life. If only I looked like that. If only I had that job. If only I were that outgoing ALL the time. If only I were that perfect. Every time we allow ourselves to think like this, we are bashing who we are in the worst way possible, and truthfully…undermining all the good parts about us as humans.

The truth is, the same people you may be comparing yourself to in everyday life could just as well be comparing themselves to you, just in different ways.

When have we become so harsh on ourselves that we create an observational task force on what features look better on others, than the ones we own? Or the aspects of our life that seem to be less than ideal, compared to the ideal in other people’s lives?

We are not continually in competition with our fellow man.

Believing we are in constant competition will most definitely have detrimental consequences to our own personal growth. Or at least our CONTENTMENT with our own personal growth.

Viewing life as one big competition is a mistake that threatens to take away all the potential encouragement and genuine happiness we could be feeling for others when they succeed!

All of us humans, are at different stages in growth and development. When you hit a certain age, usually many of your friends are at different stages in life. So, don’t beat up on yourself for not being at a certain stage yet, or not feeling you “have it all together” right now. Seriously, who DOES have it all together right away? We learn as we live.

When you remind yourself that you are not in competition with every person that comes along, gives you room to SUPPORT others! Be encouraging of others! Love others! It’s extremely freeing to realize this.  This struck me even more, when just the other day a friend was telling me about something new and important going on in their lives, and I got so overwhelmingly and genuinely excited for them!

They told me, “I’m so glad I could tell you and you’re excited about this! Because I told someone else and they weren’t excited. Actually, I think they were jealous.”

I thought, wow. I’m so glad I could be supportive of this friend. What IF I would’ve let the comparison game dominate? That would’ve been an awful mistake. Because the way I reacted is exactly how I would want my friends to react to excited news I would share with them! Support your friends. Be happy for them. Don’t compare. Don’t compete. (And trust me, this is coming from an athlete. You know how hard not competing is for me sometimes)!

Comparison Kills Contentment 

This was told to me by one of my favorite middle school teachers. Comparison kills contentment. I’ve carried that with me ever since then, and it has become so much more prevalent when I realized just how true it is through everyday life. Keep this knowledge with you and pull this saying out from the corners of your mind whenever you need that reminder.

Don’t ever allow yourself to feel inferior by the good qualities another soul possesses. The good qualities in another does not equal the lack of good qualities in yourself.

You yourself have a billion gifts and good qualities about you. Many you’ve yet to learn about! So, please, take the time to hone them, focus on your growth, and embrace all the unique aspects that make up yourself as a person.

There are indeed forms of healthy comparison.

Have mentors and role models before you, that exemplify a life worth living. There are indeed healthy reminders of how to live life. So, follow those healthy reminders wholeheartedly, because your life is a life worth living well.

So, how should we go forward and conquer UNHEALTHY comparison once and for all?

By following these steps every time the comparison bug starts to rear its head.

Remember to…

Acknowledge we are not in constant competition with our fellow man.

Acknowledge that we are on a unique journey and timeline of life, all our own.

Acknowledge comparison, more often than not, kills valuable contentment in our own personal growth.

Acknowledge that the existent of good qualities in another person does not equate the lack of good qualities in yourself.

I hope you can carry these lessons with you, as I try to carry them with me, as well.

A lot of times a writer writes something important like this, they are writing from experience, and they are also writing to remind themselves. So, you are not alone in this journey called life!

I wish you all the best and that you live a life content in the progress you are making.

Until next time,

Hannah

If you are at all curious at to the blog that this post came from, here’s the link below! Check it out!

https://wordsmithobservations.wordpress.com/

The Still Moon

Conquered by the golden crepuscule
Where dissent was forbidden growth
Moon had no voice !

Fading sky lost it’s colors
To highlight the crescent
Yet the Sun pacified
Evanescing the Moon

Darkness yearned radiance
But oh! Poor Moon
Begged the Sun
For some illumination

Hovering Clouds demeaned the Moon
Shabbily capturing all it’s beauty
Yet the moon stayed all the same
Reflecting perennially the same stillness

Living with the dead fate
Every night it continues to smile
Emanating hope with nothing to own
Charming the mortals
Who still shoot for the Moon!

————————–xxx———————————xxx———————————–

What took them there?

Let’s talk stardom today;
Lets talk super stardom;
Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi,
Diego Maradona.
Who again?
They are many;
How did they get there?
Birth?
Destiny?
Riches?
Good luck?
Determination?
Hard work?
Persistence?
Looking at these legends,
And others that you know
What advice can you give
Yourself and others willing
To listen?
What took them there?

My lesson: superstardom
Is possible to humans.

My conclusion: You can do it in your own way, in your own field. Yes, you can.

My advice: let these legends inspire you to start now to pave your own way to superstardom.

Wisdom; me.

Wisdom comes in unexpected ways. Thanks to a lot of books, I’d read, I knew this fact far earlier than I understood its true meaning.

What might be counted as mistakes, I managed to convince myself as being so obvious learning curve. So here I stand, today, not knowing if I am overlaid layers of lies on my behavior that now all I can do is a mistake again and yet not realize I have done one.

It’s time I heard it from someone I least expected from. Surprisingly it wasn’t surprising because I knew I can expect wisdom from any source, thanks to the books.

Outside my office there is a smoking zone. A vendor sells cigarettes, Gutkha and other such consumables at a far end of this side. One might refer to this place as a relaxation lounge, but open and without any seating arrangements. People come to smoke-off their stress and ‘unload’ (read talk) off-the-record.

On one fine day, it seemed like it’d rain. FitBit showed five in the evening. The combination of pleasant weather and evening time invited me to go outside and take a walk.

A colleague was with me. After a few minutes of walk we sat on the side walk itself. A cab driver in uniform was standing nearby who happen to know this colleague of mine. They started chatting. I was all ears. There followed a discussion on Central Govt. and demonetization and later state Govt. policies. Driver seemed a well-read and informed man. In our social setup one may not expect such deep understanding of these matters from a man such as himself. But this is not what made me write this matter. That happened later.

Incidentally, a group of people who were smoking nearby left cigarette stubs on the ground and started to walk away when our driver friend broke the conversation, and to everyone’s surprise, approached this group and asked them to pick the stubs and throw in the bin put along the sidewalk.

That came unexpectedly but added to the beauty of the evening; people picked what they were leaving behind and threw in dustbin with a ‘thank you’ to the driver. Evening was not lame anymore, suddenly everyone around became so attentive to what we were talking.

He returned to us with a smile; I asked him if he had done something like this before and if he had hesitated (not that I noticed any) before approaching people to correct their mistakes for some may not receive that well, especially if questioner is not what you place equal in social hierarchy (a sad truth in India). He replied, ‘Initially, people wouldn’t appreciate a driver approaching them and asking to correct their actions. I realized, after some incidents where they completely ignored me or even asked me to mind my own business or sometimes even to do their bit myself, that I had been somewhat hesitant myself since I subconsciously acknowledged that I am placed lower in society. So, I self-taught and learned, gradually, that to convince others I had be convinced myself (Leadership 101!). Hence, I threw away the prejudices & hesitation and started to speak my mind free –  with authority and concern I feel I have in such situations. I believe everyone can change when you push the right button.

I have also seen that some are there who appreciate me reminding them and may be next time they will repeat what I have done if they see someone else making the same mistake they did. It’s a chain-reaction and once provoked this feeling of responsibility keeps flowing through. I believe in power of conviction and good intentions; after all this entire country is my home and whenever and wherever I will see someone damaging its beauty I will stop, approach and ask them to correct it. People will learn, slowly, eventually.’

It was time to go back to work so I smiled, thanked him and wished him ‘all the best’ to keep making a difference. He smiled back and said, ‘I should too get back to my cab for people would be looking for their driver.’

Of course, I realized that by not stopping people from doing this mistake I was making one myself. I, now, am making one less mistake and, a difference by such small contributions.

Wisdom truly comes in unexpected ways.

Sanjeev