I changed, people noticed.

Hi friends,

How are you all doing? I am doing good as usual. I know I have been away for a long time now.  I had some personal things to take care off before resuming writing here and so the break was intentional.  

Meanwhile, I have been reading more regularly this year and learning many new things in order to improve a bit more every day.  Though I was not active here, I kept writing (in my diary and phone) about the small lessons I learned from different experiences, to share with you all here.

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A few years back, I wasn’t happy with the kind of person that I had become. I felt stuck and didn’t know how to bring about a change inside me.

I began, very slowly, by reading some good books and then implementing the easiest tips from those books. Since then I have been working on becoming a better person i.e. on improving myself. 

I know that I have changed a lot over the last few years.  I am already in love with the new person that I am in the process of becoming.

When I look back to my childhood days, I feel that I was always the person that I now strive to become but with the passing of time and life experiences, I had lost my path. I now see the struggles of the past few years as a re-route to my original path.

At times, we do not notice the impact of the small improvements that we make in our lives.  But there will be others who notice the change in us and validate it for us.

Today I want to share one such experience with you all. Do let me know if you have experienced the same.

I had been out of touch with a friend for almost six years. So when we connected again, that friend started the usual talks i.e. how life was treating her, the behavior of certain people or the struggles of life, the negatives in every situation, etc…

In response, I was very positive (not fake positive but genuine positive). I was trying to encourage her that everything was going to work out for the better. The conversation reached a point where she could no longer take it and commented that I had changed, that I had become a preacher.🙂

She felt that I was not being the “usual normal” and the conversation ended soon.

At that point, I realized that I had actually changed from being a very negative person to being optimistic. I was finally able to look at the brighter side of life even when things weren’t going right.

So how did I change myself? There were few conscious efforts made by me that helped me improve myself. I had read about them in different self-help books and learned about them from the teachings of my Guru.

  • I began by accepting the person that I was, the mistakes I had made and also accepted all my negative feelings and emotions. 
  • I began to take responsibility for everything that had happened in my life, i.e. I stopped blaming others. 
  • I began by forgiving myself and others for all the hurt. It was important to forgive myself to be able to look beyond the mistakes that I had made.
  • I began to feel grateful for everything that I had in my life.
  • I read books that increased my faith in God and positivity.
  • I learned that it was important to look for the good in every situation.
  • I began to dream about a wonderful life for me. I made myself believe that I was also destined to have good things in life.
  • I began to see the good in others. This made me a very positive person.
  • I began to stop pleasing others. This was very important because it helped me build my confidence in the choices and decisions that I was making.
  • I worked on improving myself every day.  I read, listened, learned and implemented small changes in my life. 
  • If I went back to being negative, I asked for forgiveness and tried to be positive again (I am human after all!). It is not possible to be positive all the time because of different life situations we all face.  But if we become aware of our thoughts and turn them into positive thoughts, life would definitely become better.
  • I began loving myself a bit more with each passing day. This helped me accept and love others as well.

Slowly, very slowly I started changing. Others started noticing and wanted to know the secret.

My very good friend, Gargi once told me that my conversations had changed from being totally negative to a lot positive.  She has been a big inspiration (always grateful to her) for me at that. I have seen how she thinks only good thoughts most of the time.

It is not important for others to validate our changed behavior, for us. But being a part of the society, when somebody notices the good things in us, we believe them more. We feel happy that the changes have finally happened and we have become better individuals.

On a personal level, we know that we have changed when certain situations happen and we react based on our changed behavior.

Do let me know your thoughts on the same.  As they say “Change is the only constant.” So let this change be for your better.

Take small steps. Don’t worry if it takes time because it will last a whole lifetime with you. Be happy that you decided to improve yourself. That in itself is your first victory. The world around you will notice it one day. You will notice it one day.

Love,

Rashmi

p.s. image created using Canva

p.s. This post first appeared on rashu2015

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